A Series Of Letters {Adopted by Palaye Royale}

Chapter Twelve

****trigger warning****

"Remington! Remington, what happened?" I yell as he lifts me into his arms. I cling to him, shaking slightly. "What happened!?"

"He ripped his IV out. Started fighting and screaming. I was out here with Sebastian while doctors tried to talk to him a-and," I sigh, tears filling  my eyes as my head hits his shoulder.

"What's a 'code white'?"

"Aggression," I nod, holding onto Remington tighter to signal him not to put me down. 

It's another half an hour before the doctors exit and allow us back in. Remington sets me down and we walk in. Emerson's hand is wrapped in even more gauze, and his IV has changed positions, now to the crook of his elbow. "You can't do that, dude. You scared the shit out of her."

"I didn't mean to!"

"Don't start fighting. Just....don't," I collapse into the recliner. Remington sits in a chair beside me, and Emerson sighs, tipping his head back onto the bed. 

I sigh, taking a deep breath afterwards. 

I just want everything to be okay again.

&&&&&&&&

With everything okay back at the hospital with Emerson, we left Sebastian and Stephanie with him and Remington took me home. I haven't had a proper rest in days. Remington's being amazing, and letting me sleep with him. The past few days I've had panic attacks in my sleep and I wanted him there if I had one. 

I'm currently sat at the breakfast bar, eating the spaghetti Remington made. He's cooking something up for himself currently, across the kitchen. I kick my legs back and forth. This barstool makes me feel short. I smile as I look around the kitchen. I feel safe here. 

"Heads up," Remington turns back to look at me. "If Emerson's not out by the court date, it'll just be me."

"I...okay,"

"Don't worry. I'll be right with you the whole time. You aren't going anywhere, this is just to give you our last name and get your records and stuff." I nod, and Remington sits across from me, BLT in front of him. "We've got you. You're alright,"

Small talk continues as we both eat our meals. I really fucking wanted spaghetti, but because of anxiety I can't cook. Nonetheless, Remington still made me spaghetti. I turn around and put my bowl in the sink, but stay at the island.

"I'm anxious, Remington."

"What? Why?" Concern takes over his features as he reaches across the table for me by reflex. "What's wrong, sweetie?"

"I don't know...I'm just anxious. I'm sorry if I have an attack tonight."

"Hey, don't say that. That's why you're here, so I can take care of you. It's alright," I nod, looking down until Remington makes me look up with a finger under my chin. "Smile, please? I missed it, you haven't been very smiley lately."

"I need a reason, it'll look awkward if I just smile,"

"I love you."

I gasp, my head snapping up and my eyes filling with tears. It's the first time Remington has said he loves me. I hop off the barstool, and run over to him. He hugs me tight, and I sob onto his chest. "Oh my God," I cry. "I love you too,"

Remington lifts my chin so I'm looking at him. I'm grinning from ear to ear. "There she is! There's that beautiful smile! Aww," I smile even more, digging my head into his chest and hugging him tighter.  "I love you so much, thank you."

"I love you, too, Lottie. And there's no need to say thank you. You're the ones saving us."

We wash up in the kitchen before heading upstairs. It's roughly 2:30 in the morning and I'm exhausted. Yawning, Remington smiles over at me and hands me my bag of toiletries. After washing up and brushing my teeth, I head to bed. Remington's already nearly knocked out. 

"Goodnight, Lottie..."

"Night, Remmy. Love you,"

"Love you, too...." 

And I pass out from exhaustion, right there.

"I c-c-can't b-breathe," I whimper.

"I know, I know. Relax, Lottie, I've got you." My senses slowly start to tune in. Remington's tight hold on me is the first thing I pick up on. "In for three seconds, out for three. Deep breaths," He takes one of my hands for support, and I drop my head onto his shoulder. "Take some deep breaths, Lottie. I'm right here, you're completely safe." I just whimper, continuing to listen to his voice. That's just what I tune into. Not the noise outside, not what I'm feeling. I just tune into Remington's voice.

Slowly, my breathing slows and regulates. "There you go..." Remington coaxes, rubbing my back. "Just keep breathing. You're okay, I'm right here. You're safe," 

After about another five minutes I calm down. I apologize once I see I've soaked Remington's collarbone and the collar of his shirt. "It's okay. Just get back to sleep now, I'm right here." I hug him goodnight before getting back under the covers and knocking out.