I couldn't believe it. My Alexander was cutting himself. All because of my stupid actions. I didn't even know what to do.
I sat there trying to process everything and then stood up and started pacing.
"Magnus, calm down."
I turned to Clary and froze.
"How?" I said softly. "Because of me Alexander is like that. I made him cut himself! I- I'm a monster. I never meant to hurt him like that, o-or drink, lose sleep.
Oh god..... Because of me he's in that bed."
Clary and Isabelle both got a look of shock on their face. So did Jace.
"Magnus, no. You didnt do that." Jace said.
"Don't you see. I made him upset after that last visit. His drinking and cutting got worse and he wanted to go hunting to feel no more pain. I could of killed him! I -- I have to go."
I quickly made my way out of the library while everyone was screaming my name.
Once I made it outside I fell to my knees and cried.
"It's my fault. It's my fault. It's my fault." I softly repeated over and over again like a broken record.
I heard the door open and felt arms around me. I quickly responded and leaned into them.
"Magnus, all that matters is that you are here with us now. And I'm happy that you actually wanted to be there for him this entire time. I understand why you didn't. And it's okay."
I look over and say Izzy.
"Do you hate me?" I asked slowly. I looked at everyone else behind her "Do any of you hate me?"
"Magnus we would never hate you."
"I'm sorry. About everything."
Izzy gave me a smile and slowly made me stand up, taking me back inside.
When we got to the infirmary I saw a couch in there that I never noticed before.
"Okay from what I can tell you haven't slept in a long time so sleep. And we are calling Cat to come heal you. Scars, weight, anything."
I nodded my head and got on the couch that's beside Alec's bed. Everyone walked out and I finally feel asleep since a long time.
