Thoughts

Storms

"But never have I been a blue calmed sea, I've always been a storm. "
-Fleetwood Mac, Storms

If I were to describe myself
Through words that my heart can't expalin
A storm could be the accurate one
For my days can start with a wide bright sun
And end up with an enormous thunderstorm

Full of tears and sobs
My heart just lets it go
All the fear and the pain
All the stress and the rage

My eyes are a couple of doors
Connected by the beat of my heart
When the latter begins to fall
The doors are opened and allow
Two endless waterfalls that slowly
Make the sadness even more high

Pity is not what I search
Nor is it attention because of my pain
Just a warm hug is what I urge
So that I can stop all the drops from falling down

Grey eye bags
R

eminding me of clouds

Deep sobs
Such as the thunders in the sky

All the birds and the sun
Run away from this storm
For it is too loud and wet
Such as my heart and the pain I can bear

After the storm, comes the sun, they say
After the pain, happiness comes agian
Though I know, that happiness is so small
Compared to the storms that my heart can recall

I'm so tired of this tears
I'm so tired of the rain
My sky hurts so much
And not even sleeping I can

I can feel it in my throat
The thunders coming up
The raindrops begin to fall
As my heart in pieces breaks down

I don't feel the purity and beauty that I'm supposed to have
For my sins are too high and far from forgiveness
Which I don't expect from any god
But from myself

The storm has remained for a couple of days
I can feel it when I smile
I can sense it when I'm hugged
My heart is already a mess
And I'm not sure if it can be fixed by just smiling and saying everything is OK