Chibs | Sick of being Used | Tig | Sons of Anarchy || Book Three

Turning Over

I tossed my kutte down onto the table before Clay and Jax. Clay just looked at the kutte while Jax looked up at me.

"Are you serious?"

He asked me. I didn't say or do anything. I just looked at the reaper on the back of the kutte. I heard Jax huff as he probably shook his head.

"Why in the hell are you turning in your kutte. You just got it -- yesterday!"

He asked. I finally looked up at him, but before I could speak Clay interrupted me.

"Gemma tore me a new one last night. When she seen the kutte on Clara's back, she went ballistic. I imagine I'm not the only one she ripped into last night?"

Clay's voice sounded tired. Gemma must have kept him up all night yelling at him for giving me the kutte. I couldn't blame him though, had I been sober Gemma probably would have had me crying.

And then there was Tig.

Of course nobody except Kozik knew about what happened last night. All around I just felt completely horrible about everything.

"I just can't have her upset at everyone because of me."

I gave them that being my reasoning. Jax just looked at me and shook his head.

"Clara, no offense, but Gemma she's an Ol'Lady, she doesn't get to say what happens in this club and what doesn't."

Jax said speaking up. I looked at him and then to the Reaper on the black leather surface.

"Ol'Lady huh... does that mean I'd never be able to be an Ol'Lady if I staid in the club?"

I asked looking back at Jax. I could see he was confused as he shook his head.

"You've never wanted to be anyone's ol'lady so what does it matter?"

Well that answered that for me. I didn't say anything else as I waved my hand toward the kutte and muttered my thanks before leaving the room.

I felt horrible as I walked outside.

"Ya turned it in didn't ya?"

Chibs asked from the picnic table as I walked past him. It was obvious that's what happened. Stopping and turning to face him I looked at him. His hair was so long now and his face held age lines, so much so it was hard to distinguish the scars from Jimmy and what was just him.

"Yeah. Gem wasn't happy about my choice of joining the club anyway."

I said with a shrug as I rubbed my chubby thighs with the bottoms of my hand before putting them in my back pants pockets.

I watched as Chibs inhaled from his cigarette before blowing the smoke out and away from me.

"Probably fer the best anyway. Didn't want ya gettin hurt."

I raised a brow as I then crossed my arms over my chest. He raised a brow and looked at me.

"You know, you're the second person to tell me this in the last twenty four hours whose part of this club. How the fuck did the vote pass with two memebers voting no?"

All it took was one no vote to allow anyone in the club. So how the fuck did this happen.

Chibs shook his head.

"Nobody voted no. We all trusted Clay's decision ta let ya come into tha club."

My mouth fell agape for a moment. So basically nobody voted against Clay. And yet from the way I was understanding this nobody had wanted me in the club in the first place. I shook my head and turned around to walk away.

"Clara wait."

I heard Chibs climb down off the picnic table and before I knew it he had a hold of my forearm and was turning me to face him.

"Come back home with me."

I raised a brow. This was the first time he had asked me back home with him since the guys all got out of prison.

"You know I can't. If they don't think I'm still living here then they'll know something is up."

I told him. It was true. Once the guys had went away we didn't have to worry. Gemma and Kozik already knew. I was pretty sure Opie was onto us by now ever since the whole Russian warehouse event but he was always too busy to constantly be around.

I could see the conflict in Chibs's face. He wanted me home with him but he knew that at the same time I had a point.

"I'm tired of actin like we aren't anything."

He finally said squeezing my arm a bit. I looked up and him and sighed. For almost three years we had been sneaking around one another as if nothing was going on. I knew that one day he'd get tired of it eventually.

"Chibs I -- "

"I want ya ta be my woman, Clara."

He told me in a deep and very quiet voice. My eyes widened slightly as I stood there shocked to what he just asked me.

"I want ya to have my Crow."

He added which brought on an even bigger shock to me. Then to top it all off Chibs pulled me flush against his chest. Both hands holding my forearms as he looked down at me and I up at him.

"I love you, Clara."

He said before he leaned down and kissed me. My eyes closed out of habit as we stood there in the middle of the TM parking lot in broad daylight kissing each other.

I felt my fingers laced around his kutte as I kept him close to me. I began to see that maybe I needed him just as badly as he needed me.

Feeling his tongue press against my lips I parted them to let him roam my mouth freely. I sighed as I felt his calloused hands move from my arms, up over my neck, and to the sides of my face.

He turned his head slightly at an angle to deepen the kiss. His beard scratching my soft face as the kiss became more than just a kiss at this point.

Pulling away for a breath of air I sighed deeply and reopened my eyes to look up at him. His dark chocolate brown eyes looked down sadly at me.

It nearly broke my heart.

"Gemma is having a family dinner in three days... we can tell everyone then."

I said as a smile graced his face. His little dimples on the sides of his cheeks showed he wore such a large smile before he came back in for another kiss.

He seemed happy with my answer.