kanye and me look at each other. the sky is completely dark now. i can still hear Hitler and Shadow are fucking in my fucking outhouse. "hey... Kanye..? can you w-wait inside.. i have to um... take care of some business." i point my large green thumb at the outhouse. "okay. sure thing." kanye waddles (because his pants are saggy) to my swamp house.
once kanye is inside i stomp up to the outhouse. "SHAWDO AND SHITLER!! GET OUT OF MY POOP HOUSE!!! YOU ARE MWBER INVITED HERE AGAJN!! YOU HEAR ME?!"
they laugh. they are so mean. i hate them. "i don't vant to come ere evah again anyvay. it smells like onions. i HATE onions" stupid shart face (Hilter) says. "yeah!" says idiot poopy brain (Shadow). i roar in there face. "GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I SCREAM SO LOUD!!!! MY EYES STING A LITTLE BUT STILL IM SO PROUD OF MYSELF. THAT WAS SUCHA GOOD YELL! they go super white and pale and stuff in the face.
they run. i've never seen them exercise before. i was kind of impressed.
i wipe my hands and turn on my heals. i smirk a bit and i swagger inside. i'm feeling super confident and proud rn. most of the people still here are either sleeping on the floor or making out with the wall. i have stupid frens. why did i become frends with these iditots? i look around.
i search the whole house and i can't find kanye anywhere.... maybe it was just a silly daydream (that i had at night but wasn't a sleep for). i just knew it was too good to be true.... i'm so sad now. my confidence vibe goes down the drain. i'm such a loser. i should go die in a whole somewhere.
i slowly walk to my bedroom because i'm so sad and want to cry some more. i'll probably scream into my pillow because that's fun. but i stop at the door because i hear simone inside. i slam the door open and roar because i'm not in the nice mood. "WHAT THE HECK TURD FACE!! WHY ARE YOU IN MY R–" i stop. my face lights up. "KANYE! ITS U! i-i'm sorry! i thought you were someone else! i thought you went home."
"i'm sorry i spooked you Shrek. why would i go home? this is an awesome party." kanye giggles and it sounds like beautiful heaven angels.
"hey shrek. ive seen you around the halls at school and always though you seemed cool. i've been too scared to talk to you... but i want to ask you something...." kanye moves around me and shuts the door. he locks it.
"Shrek... do you.. um.." he faces me and puts his hands on my shoulders. he guides backwards to my bed. my face goes red. he sits me on my bed and whispers:
YOU ARE READING
shrek's birthday surprise
Fanficshrek has an awesome birthday party! until his friends ruin it by ditching him and making out in his outhouse. but when shrek is ready to give up on the best birthday ever, he gets a special surprise ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ )
