7/20/17
Oh god I am just too impatient I can't stand having to wait in this ROOM while my daughter's in there, in pain. I was reading a magazine when they called my name. I looked up dazed for a moment and then realized that it was me that they had called. I put down my magazine in the pile beside me and slowly stood up. I felt this mix of dread and relief.
It made my stomach uneasy when I saw her, unconscious and bandaged up like that. Oh god I broke my heart to see that my baby was like this. I beat myself up on the inside. I wasn't a good enough mother. If only I hadn't let her go out that night. If only.
They told me that she had gotten in an accident with that boyfriend of her's. This of course I already knew. I felt this anger. This red hot anger deep within me at myself, her, and that lowlife she called her boyfriend. He was the reason she was in this mess, because of him she would be scared like this for the rest of her life.
I heard that he had gotten it just as bad as she did. I felt guilt as I thought that he deserved it. He deserves all this pain, he should have her pain too. He should suffer. Oh no this isn't who I am. No, no, no, no, no, no. This is just my mother's instinct.
I decided to try and take my mind off him and just focus on her. My sweet innocent daughter. I started to cry. Not your dainty boo hoo. No a full on blubbering, snotty mess. I sat there sobbing my eyes out sitting beside this 'thing'. This was not my daughter. No I can't accept it. I just can't, but yet here right in front of me she is.I had to get out of there. I had to take a walk to clear my head.
I walked out her room and continued to walk till I was out of the hospital. I got in my car and drove off. I am a coward. I can't handle this.
I drove and drove and drove until I saw the railing and
Unedited
A/N: Guys or people who read this garbage, do you like these or do you want me to do something else? I have no idea what I'm doing with this book, but whatever. Thanks for reading this awful trash.
