To Tame A Vampire

Chapter 13 ~Words Cut Deeper Than A Knife

A/N This chapter will contain self-harm so be warned. Don't be a silent reader comment your thoughts. 

Chapter 13 ~Words Cut Deeper Than A Knife

I will not be another flower, picked for my beauty and left to die. I will be wild, difficult to find, and impossible to forget. ~Erin Van Vuren 

*******************

Quincy's POV

Silent tears ran down my face as I looked at my now bloody sink. It's been years since I've last cut myself and I'm a little sad to say I missed the pain. "I deserve this" I whisper to myself "I'm disgusting I should just kill myself" I say as I cut another line into my arm. 

All the hurtful words anyone has ever said to me was forgotten and I didn't care. But when he said those words it scarred worse then the damage I'm doing to myself. 

'Since I'm a vampire it won't scar it will heal in a while but if I cut too deep...' I shook my head I couldn't dwell on the thought. "But it might be for the best" I said to myself while cutting a little deeper then before. 

"Everyone will be relieved that I'm gone I'm just extra baggage" I cut a little deeper and watch as the blood seeps through the newly cut skin. 

"Is that really what you think" I hear a bored voice say. 

I jump and the blade falls from my hand I turn around and face Sarah. She gave me a menacing glare and grabbed my arm bringing it under the sink. "Ow it hurts" I hissed trying to pull my arm away from the hot water. 

"You didn't say that when you inflicted this pain on yourself" she said. 

I looked down "I'm sorry" I whimper. 

She sighed "Don't apologize to me you were the one to promise your parents that you will never hurt yourself again. And here we are" she muttered the last part. 

"I'm so sorry" I repeated "It's just he said those things and I-" my voice faltered. 

She tightened her grip on my hand "He?" she questioned. 

I winced at her strength and she is only 13. Vampires don't shift till 16 so if she's already this strong and fast just imagine when she gets her vampire. I sniffled and didn't answer her question I looked to the ground as she finished wrapping my cuts. 

"They weren't too bad they'll heal without scarring" she said. "I need to go" she went to turn away and I knew exactly where she was going. 

"Sarah wait please don't hurt him I lov-" she cut me off.

"Love him? Quincy please how can you love someone who doesn't give two shits about you" she scoffed. 

"He does care about me" I snapped. 

"Really because someone who cares about you wouldn't hurt you" she snarled. 

"He was just having a bad day he needed someone to take it out on" I defended. 

"You just described an abusive relationship" she walked out of the room without another word. 

***********************

I was walking back and forth in my room waiting for Sarah to return home. It was already 12 in the morning and she wasn't home yet. I was reaching for my phone when someone barged into my room. 

I jumped and looked at the intruder "Sarah is in the Grey Shadow Pack's cells" Wayne -Sarah's admirer- cried. 

My face paled 'What did she do' I cried in my head. "What did she do" I voiced out my thoughts. 

"She um..." he fiddled with his thumbs and looked at me with pity in his eyes. 

"You're stalling" I gritted through my teeth. 

"She killed future Alpha Evan" he said avoiding eye contact with me. 

I staggered backwards <Why didn't I feel any pain then> I asked Lawrence. 

<Because you rejected him remember> he said numbly. 

"How do you know all this" I asked. 

"Because the future gamma is at the door. He wants to give his condolences...I guess" he said. 

I pushed past him and ran downstairs where that boy Donovan was standing with bloodshot eyes as if he's been crying. "Is it true" I asked quietly. 

"They sent me to tell you" he nodded "He flat lined and they were working on getting a pulse back when I left. They said they would contact when they get a heartbeat but they haven't and it's been 12 minutes" he explained.

"What happened" I asked my voice cracking and tears threatened to fall from my eyes. 

"She challenged him and being the future Alpha he can't back down from a duel. But she talked to him before the fight and whatever she told him must have affected him because he didn't fight back" he looked concerned. He looked me in the eyes "If he dies they're going to have to kill her too" he said. 

I grabbed onto the wall for support but I still fell to the floor in tears "H-He can't be dead I mean surely there must be something that can save him" I cried. 

He shook his head "Well they sent me to send our condolences" he said.

I chuckled humorlessly "Shouldn't it be me the one to give my condolences to the family" I said. 

"You are his mate you are part of the family" he said gently. 

"No I'm not I rejected him" I spat through my tears and sobs. 

"What" he asked. 

"He didn't want me the day he met me he wanted to reject me so I did it for him that way he'll get a second chance mate" I explain it seems like I always have to explain myself. 

He nodded "I got to go dude but I'll see you around I guess" he said before leaving me on the floor in tears. 

*******************

I was curled up into a ball on my bed listening to Marina and the Diamonds and remembering the day I introduced him to her music. Tears were flowing down my face 'He's really gone' was flowing through my mind. What about the six kids we planned on having? What about his pack there's no one to take on the Alpha title? 

<If only we were still his mate we could just mark him and he'll get better> Lawrence said sadly. 

I perked up <Wait Lawrence say that again> I asked. 

<If only we were still his mate> he said confused. 

<No the part about marking him and saving him> I said. 

<Oh that well yeah when you mark your beloved it gives them extra strength and heals them. Maybe if we were still his mate marking him might heal him but that's a huge might we don't know for sure> he explained. 

<Lawrence we have to give it a try> I said desperately.

<I don't know about that Quincy> he said wearily. <What if it does work and he wakes up he'll be marked by us and I don't think he'll appreciate that> 

<I don't care we can deal with that when he wakes up> I argued. 

<But we don't know if he'll wake up or not> he pointed out. 

<He will> I said determinedly while getting up. <We're going to the Grey Shadow Pack> I told him while slipping my shoes on and making my way outside. 

This will work I will save him.

******************

A/N Oh shit what's going to happen now. Well BYEE!!!