I'm having a bad night tonight
something I don't have quite often
I mean, yeah, I don't always feel well,
but this is different
this is dysphoria
this is crying
I never cry, except when I feel blessed or I'm proud of someone
I don't cry in stressful situations
I don't cry when things get rough
except for tonight
when I really start to think my body isn't right
when the thoughts start coming back
more violent and worse
when your parents start to attack you
when your friends start to betray you
when nothing goes your way
you think
"what did I do to deserve this"
when your other language makes it worse
when it should make it better
speaking in a different tongue
makes everything more clear
except not tonight
not on this night
I just need somebody
to save me from the darkness
to help me sort my facts
not a shrink, not a god
a person
just a person
to hear my voice of treason
to stop this pain tonight
YOU ARE READING
those days
Poetryon the first day I told myself I wouldn't do it I wouldn't hurt them like I have before everything was a lie
