amsterdam - imagine dragons
harry's point of view
i was stumbling around, drunk out of my mind. my vision was blurred, it traced along, like i was living in fast motion. adrenaline pumped through my veins, as i drank whatever i could find. i usually don't drink much, i only have a beer here or there. but tonight called for me to get completely wasted out of my mind, because whatever chance or sliver of hope i had with elise vanished! i thought she might've liked me back, but no, she goes for a taller, better looking guy. okay, i can't blame her. she only saw me as a friend! but it still fucking hurt.
remember what i said about everything being better when you're head over heels? false. because the person that you're head over heels for only pictures you as a friend, and nothing more. hopelessness controlled me, and no matter how drunk i got, i wasn't feeling good at all. so much for drinking to forget my problems. i walk upstairs to my room, and open the door to see two strangers making out on my bed. "ew!" i slurred, "get the fuck out!" i yelled, and the two nodded fearfully, collecting themselves and dashing out. i walked over to my little balcony, sitting on a stringy wooden chair with a cushion in the middle. i heard the door to the balcony open, and i turn my head and see elise walking in, smiling weakly. the dress she was wearing hugged her body perfectly, she was like a work of art i just couldn't help but admire. her brown eyes, her tall body, the little smile she does when her tongue is pressed against her teeth, she was perfect.
"hey." she stated, clearly sobered up from whatever alcohol she consumed moments prior. i heaved a sigh.
"elise, i don't get it!" i slurred, and my thoughts were soon controlling what i was saying. "i'm right here!" i yelled, and she raised an eyebrow.
"what?" she asked, shifting in her seat, then she leaned forward.
"i'm right here, i understand you, i know you. i'll treat you like a fucking queen!" i shouted, anger and frustration rising in my tone. i was right here, but she overlooked me, like i was fucking nothing. i couldn't control myself, i needed to get everything off of my chest.
"harry, what are you saying?" she questioned, her voice rising slightly. i sucked in a breath through my gritted teeth, letting the painful coolness strike me.
"i'm saying that i like you. i have feelings for you, and i have for a little while, but you completely ignore me." i admit, standing up, stepping closer to her. she stood up as well, not cowering whatsoever. it was like she was daring me to look back into her brown irises, she wasn't intimidated one bit.
"you're just drunk." she scoffed, licking her lips while shaking her head.
"a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts." i argued.
"harry please, i-"
"i know you, elise. come on, i know that you've thought about it too." i remarked, and she sighed. "admit it!" i demanded, and she bit her lip.
"i'm just going to hurt you." she quaked, her lips quivering. it was like she was about to burst, and i could tell that tears were starting to creep up on her by the break in her voice.
"the only way you're going to hurt me is by rejecting me! don't you understand elise? you're not this broken, fucked up girl left alone; you have people, you have people that care about you! i know you're really depressed right now, but by not taking any chances, pain is only going to take a bigger toll on you. take a fucking chance on me!" i argued, my jaw clenched. i could fix her, so many people could. but she just didn't let anybody in, therefore it was difficult to help her. she let out a small cry, and i breathed heavily. i knew i just dropped a major truth bomb on her, and she needs to process it. i feel sobered up now, completely aware of my surroundings. i felt eerily awake.
"harry, you don't understand." she quivered, and i scoffed loudly and slightly annoyed.
"i don't understand? after i lost gemma, i was so fucked up. i went out, drank anything, i did some hardcore drugs, i got high, i got wasted, just to forget. i destroyed things, i hurt people, i hurt myself. i hit rock bottom so fucking hard, elise. i had no other option but to go back up. i didn't accept her death, because she was my only fucking friend, i was a lonely weird boy who nobody dared to go near, and when she died, something snapped in me. elise, i understand more than anybody ever would, so don't fucking say that to me!" i protested, and she shook her head. "don't lie to me, elise. i read right through that bullshit."
"fine, okay? i'll admit, i do have feelings for you, and i don't know why. but in the end, i'm so fucking messed up i'm just going to hurt you!" she screamed, and i shook my head. doesn't she see? this stubborn girl can't get this through her thick head.
but, she admitted it. she had feelings for me as well. i had to suppress a smile from creeping onto my lips. i put my hands on my hips, and bit my lip while shaking my head.
"elise, please let me help you." i begged.
"fine."
"what?"
"fine! help me, fix me, put me back together, harry, just fucking do it-"
i interrupted her by harshly pressing my lips against hers, cupping her face in my hands. she kissed me back immediately, the kiss was passionate and filled with hunger. her hands hugged my waist, snaking their way around me, pulling me closer. i let out a sigh of content, relieved that i finally got to kiss her.
it was better than i could have ever imagined, better than i could have ever lusted for. this kiss was raw, and genuine.
it was real.
a/n
i gtg like rn, sorry babes!! so this is unedited, apologies. but WOPOPOO
update: i edited it wooooo
xx,ella
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