Dear Cam,

It's been two months.
In those two months I saw you three times.

The first time I saw you it was Fourth of July... it was weird, it was different. He was there, trying to convince me to cave in again, I rejected his idea but we talked a lot, I barely talked to you, when we decided to go into the ocean we had a moment there, splashing around, doing a war with seaweed, but then our hands met under the water but someone stop to talk to me and I turned but you were softly tugging my hand..but when our fingers interlaced I fully let go. We said we were just friends, so later that day we played some soccer and football, I punched you when you said some douche-like comment and embarrassingly my stick on nail popped off.
The second time was awkward, it was my birthday party..after most of my friends left you had my full attention you talked to me about another girl and I heard your phone call with her, that stung.
In those two months I learned things about you that you wouldn't have dared to tell me, I was so mad, I fell for some version of you that wasn't even the real you, it was like an illusion of you.
The third time I saw you, I was trying to ignore you, I was trying to show you what you missed out on as I sat watching the baseball game. I was proving to you and myself that I was over it (I truly was), I had developed something again for him, but I made sure you didn't notice it, i told you I wouldn't go back to him and that's what I did, I didn't go back –I simply dipped my foot in the water– later that night we all played in the bar's arcade, it was fun, all three of us had fun.
It was nice, but I think I realized how much I didn't love you.
I realized how better off I am without you.
When we were together I made a bracelet out of some beads and string, what it said was a nickname you had for me. When I told my brother I was ready to move on he started untying it and for once I let him, but as soon as the knot fell out and the bracelet fell off I felt so vulnerable and naked, I gasped for air and my lip started quivering as tears fled to my eyes, my brother tried to console me tell me it was time and that I'd be okay. He was right.
I really truly am finally over you.

And the final answer is: i was right to have never told you 'I loved you', the reason for that is I had promised to never lie to you.
And I –unlike you, Cam– always keep my promises.

xo,
L.