Choices

His choice

"Please don't create a drama here Riya..."

I woke up to Abhi's spiteful words. Riya was standing in a corner of the white-walled hospital room, hugging herself. Abhi was staring outside the window, his back to us.

Even Riya's loud sobs which would normally bring out my protective streak couldn't bring me out of my numbness. But those sobs were increasing his irritation every second.

"SHUT UP OR GET THE HELL OUT!!"

His booming voice made me hiss which announced that I was awake. Riya ran towards me intending to embrace me in a reassuring hug but Abhi's menacing glare stopped her. I knew he was being unreasonable. Riya was also a victim in this mess. But I couldn't get out of my trance to knock some sense into his head or console Riya.

"How are you feeling?"

The question just got my silence as a reply. I was afraid that my voice would snap the thread holding my sanity together.

The atmosphere around us was an unceremonious mix of anguish and sorrow.

"This was never meant to happen. I din't..." Riya's ramble was cut off when the door was banged open.

"My baby..." It was Arunthati, Abhi's mom.

She wasn't there for her son. She did not embrace him in her motherly love. The fact that she too did not get a glimpse of her son for two years did not matter to her at that moment.

She ran towards my bed, tears painting her crinckled skin and held me in a tight hug as if to reassure that I was still there. As if she was the anchor holding me to the world and I would vanish into thin air if not for her.

May be at that moment, I would have.

I burried myself within her love. Her scent brought a small assurance that I wasn't alone in this world.

"Nothing wrong is going to happen my baby. I'm here now, I'll handle everything. Don't worry" Her soothing voice managed to slightly lift the shell which cocooned me in a state of numbness.

I nodded, holding on to her.

I'm not alone. I'm not alone.

My mind replayed those words frantically, hoping it would ward off my insecurities. These insecurities ate me up my whole life. I was always afraid that I would end up belonging to no one. I was always frightened that no one would be there for me to pamper with love, to create memories with, to create a home with. I was scared that no one would be there to love me. Aarav changed everything, he shooed off my every single insecurity, he made me feel belonged and beloved. But now they came back with vengeance.

"She is not ment to be mine"

I desperately hoped that his words would leave me. I closed my eyes, willing to wake from this horrible nightmare.

I prayed that this should be a prank played on me. I wanted Aarav to jump into the room, wack over my head and call me a cry baby.

But my prayer wasn't answered.

"Riya... You wanted to see if she is alright. I think she is. So you can leave now" Abhi's displeasure was evident in his tone.

"But..."

"It's better for all of us, if you leave now" his unveild threat cut off Riya again.

With an uncertain look, she left.

******

It's been 3 hours, since I regained my conscious. The doctor said I was too weak and the stress which I'm undergoing is not good for the baby. I felt guilty that my unborn child had to suffer due to my cursed luck. Was I that much of a sinner that I shouldn't even rejoice over my motherhood. This is supposed to be the most precious phase of my life, yet I didn't even get a chance to share this with my loved ones in person.

I dreamt that I would mentally capture everyone's surprised expression while revealing this news. Yet I was not even awake when the doctor informed everyone that I pregnant.

A bitter chuckle escaped me on that reminder. Abhi turned towards me hearing that.

"Dont think of anything. We'll work this out" Abhi's tone was so soft, as if he was talking to a wounded baby. I couldn't believe he was the same man who was planning my husband's murder two hours back.

I nodded. He sighed.

"Why are you not talking?"  My confused frown made him realize that I wasn't in a state to comprehend anything.

"You haven't spoken a single word since you woke up"

I did not realize that and I din't want to acknowledge that an extra wall has been added to shield myself. So I shrugged.

Abhi folded his hands and stared down at me like a dad intimidating his petulant child. It always managed to make me confess my actions.

When I was about to talk, a loud crash echoed through the room. The vase beside the door fell down due to the force with which the door was banged open.

My heart skipped a beat looking at the man who stood at the threshold. With bags of sleeplessness under his eyes and a tear strained face, he looked nothing like the Charming buisness man he proclaimed to be. He probably looked like a soldier limping out of a battle ground. Instead of blood, he had stress and guilt spattered over his shirt.

But all I could see was my twenty-two year old, handsome Aarav who made me feel beautiful for the first time. I could only see the Aarav who made me feel admired. I could only see the Aarav who promised me an eternity filled with love. I could only see the person with whom my heart is still hopelessly in love with.

"You are pregnant"

Shock and guilt radiated from him. But I couldn't hear his words. All I could hear was his proposal.

"I don't promise you the moon and stars, but I promise you a eternity filled with love"

He moved forward, "Please don't take any rash decision". His face displayed how panicked he was. But his words were drowned in the memory of our matrimony.

"From now, you are mine. Your smile, your laugh, your happiness, your sorrow,your mistakes, your heart, everything belongs to me. And I'm yours"

"I know that you probably hate me now. But please don't throw me out of your life. We have another life to take care of." He knelt near the feet of the hospital bed in which I was lying.

"I beg you, please!" He was holding my feet, burying his face in them. The man who walked out of high-profile firm denying them an apology was now washing my feet in his tears.

"You are an Angel, my Angel. We may have even hundred kids in future, but you will remain as my first child. You are and will always be my world" the memories we made dashed before my eyes.

"Please!!" he sobbed out aloud. But his sob was muffled by his morning confession.

"She was truly an Angel and I loved her at some point...

But not anymore..."

His words were playing with my mind, our memories were crushing my heart, his confession held my throat in a painful grip and choked me. This merciless torture made me hyperventilate.

My scream pierced the air.

It was deafening even to my ears. I was sobbing and screaming but those memories wouldn't leave me.

Two pair of hand tried to constrain me but I was trashing like a fish out of water, gasping for air and hoping to live.

"You are my world, Princess!!"

"An eternity filled with love..."

"You are mine"

"She is not ment to be mine"

"MAKE HIM LEAVE ABHI" I shouted to overpower the words echoing in my mind.

"Make him leave..." with this feeble request, I entered into unconsciousness to escape my cruel reality.

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