Taking Chances

Car Ride and Just Jia

A/N: Hi, longest UD so far. Sorry wala akong idea masyado sa campus ng Ateneo!  Thanks for reading!

BEA

“Uhm… Julia?” mahina kong tawag sa kanya. Buti nalang nga may boses pang lumabas, dahil sa sobrang kaba ko, parang abot hanggang sa lalamunan ang tibok ng puso ko.

Walang reaction, baka di niya narinig, kaya tinawag ko siya ulit “Julia?” medyo malakas na ulit ko.

This time lumingon siya sa akin at nabigla ako ng makitang pulang-pula at namumugto ang mga mata niya.

She’s been crying!?

“Ah… eh….” nauutal kong sabi. My mind was suddenly blank.

I couldn’t think! I couldn’t get over the fact that she has been crying. I wanted to reach out and comfort her, but at the same time I was scared that she might push me away.

Sino nga ba naman ako to do that di ba? I mean, we don’t even talk!

My thoughts were suddenly disturbed when she said,  “I have a lot of things to do, bukas nalang tayo mag-usap.” And then she stormed out slamming the locker door closed.

I was stunned, I mean I know napagalitan kami kanina, and I feel bad about that too, but I don’t go around slamming doors in people’s faces.

Sabi na nga ba na this was a bad idea.

I knew it was late, bumalik lang naman ako because I left my planner sa locker ko. I did not expect that anybody would still be there, especially not her.

I should have turned around when I saw her, but my stupid brain kept urging me to try and talk to her about what happened earlier, and see where that got me?

Sesh! So much for trying to reach out!

I understand her though, I have been feeling bad since the training started. I know I haven’t been performing my best.

Sino ba naman kasi ang makakapag-laro ng maayos kung palagi ka nalang kinakabahan?

Everytime magkakatabi kami ni Jia eh I can’t seem to focus. She makes me nervous. Heck just the sight of her makes my heart beat fast, what more yung magkatabi na kami sa court?

Although I have been trying really hard to work on this, mali-mali pa rin ang ginagawa ko. Everytime she gives me the ball, it’s either I’m a second too late or di ko mapalo ng maayos.

I can’t help it!

And yun na nga, kanina nagalit na si coach Tai.

I felt really bad nung pinatawag niya kami kanina, I was hoping na sana kainin nalang ako ng lupa. But I felt so much worse when I saw na mangiyak-ngiyak si Jia after.

I pretended to smile nalang when Maddie and Therese approached me, para di masyado halata na affected. But all those time all I really wanted to do was approach her and say sorry. And now this happened.

“Haaay” I wanted to cry, but I couldn’t. I have to be strong.

I needed to compose myself so umupo nalang muna ako sa bench doon sa locker room at nagisipi-isip.

Deep breaths Bea, deep breaths. Simula palang ito, you’ll get over this.

After a few minutes, I decided to go home na. wala naman din akong magagawa since she said na bukas na kami mag-uusap.