what do you call this kind of thing

22. Intake

Johnnies P.O.V.
I wake up, my arm throbbing. I would take some ibprophen, but I feel like I should have to deal with the pain. I did this to myself, after all.
Nat is still asleep, next to me. I check my phone, still laying by Nat.
Richie: how did things go with Nat last night? I should be back from Eugenia's around 5 unless u need more time
I reply quickly.
Johnnie: everything's ok. That should be good. Me and Nat might have to go somewhere today though later.
Richie: that's good, and ok. *nat and i*
I roll my eyes at his typo-cd (typo OCD, for the slower readers lol) I'm dreading my agreement already to try counseling. I guess it will be worth it if it works though.

Nat wakes up about an hour later. Probably from me moving around too much, but it's hard to stay comfy when your arm is sliced up. He rubs his eyes and wraps an arm around me.
"So I looked on the internet last night, and there's a counseling office about a 5 minuet drive from here. I set up an intake appointment for today at three. Is that ok?"
I nod, sighing and burying my face in his neck.
"Your going with me right?"
"Of course, if you want me too."

The day goes by too quickly. Before I know it, I. Getting in the car, Nat driving us to the office looking building. We get there, and Nat gets out. He starts walking in, and then realizes I'm not by his side. He turns, with a cute confused look on his face, to see that I'm still in the car. He comes back, leaning in the rolled down window.
"Are you ok?" I nod, even though my anxiety is through the roof.
"Alright. I'm going to open your door now so we can go inside." He says. I nod. I get out of the car, and grab his hand, holding it tightly. He looks down at me and smiles. "C'mon."

After sitting in a neat looking small waiting room for about three minuets and forty two seconds, but who's counting, were led into a different room.
This counseling office is much different than the ones I was put in in high school. There's a couch, and a small desk in the corner. Shelves on the walls ar filled with wooden nicknacks and leafy colored plants. Nat practically pulls me in, sitting on the couch and me sitting my him. They're a short small woman sitting in a rolly chair across from us.
"You must be Johnnie." She says, looking at me and putting out her hand. I nod, and shake her hand with the hand that's not holding Nats. "And your Nat," she also shakes Nats hand. "Your his..."
"Boyfriend." Nat says. She nods.
"So what brings you here Johnnie?"
I'm silent, staring at my feet, how am I supposed to tell this random woman about my worst fears that haunt me every night? Nat nudges my leg with our hands. I look up at him. He's smiling reassuringly.
"Um..." I look up at her. She looks friendly. "I have bad nightmares." She nods, like she gets this every day.
"Alright. Is there any specific things that reader in your nightmares?" I take another moment to reply.
"Abandonment, fucking- uh, sorry, messing everything up... hurting m-myself and others..." I can't believe Im telling this stranger about my dreams. What if she thinks they're dumb? What if she tells ,e I've got to many issues? Nat squeezes my hand. They're both looking at me expectantly.
"Uh.. what?"
She smiles. " I said, it's ok to swear, and what do you usually do when you wake up from a nightmare? What's your most common coping mechanism?" I swallow, trying to clear my head. This could only work if I participate.
"Um... sometimes I cut, or stay awake for a long time. Like with caffeine and stuff." I decide not to mention the drug incident.
"Okay. So the first thing I want to do is let you know that a lot of people have nightmares that effect their daily life. Your not alone there. Also, it may help you to talk about your night mares with a trusted person or a loved one." I look at Nat, smiling a tiny bit. " I want to go over some healthy things you can do when you wake up from a nightmare."

After the appointment is over, I feel a little better about this whole counseling thing. We're in the car on the way back home. I'm holding Nats hand, our hands resting on his thigh. "That wasn't so bad, i guess." I say.
He smiles at me. "I'm proud of you for going."

Richie is back when we get back. I pull off the uncomfortable long sleeved shirt I had on as soon as we get home.
"Ooooo johnnies stripping!" Richie says. I laugh.
"Wait, I'm not prepared!" Nat says. The. He pulls off his shirt too. Richie and I laugh, and Richie pulls his shirt off too.
"Now I feel less left out." He says.
We all hang out in the living room for a while, Richie and I planning to make up for the missed video time. Luckily, I have a few backup videos to post for the days I'm not able to film, like yesterday and today. But I do need to get back at it. Well have to do a lot tomorrow, but that's ok. Nat does t have of work for a few days, so he can be in the videos too. My media had been exploding with things about Nat and me. Or Nat and I, as Richie would correct.

It's time for bed. I'm exhausted from the emotional roller coaster the last days have been. Nat and I are cuddling bed, me replying to comments on social media. I post a thing asking for boyfriend q and a questions. I'm replying to a comment when Nat takes my phone out of my hand, and throws it on the ground by the bed. "Hey! What was that for?" I lightly punch him, trying not to laugh. He grabs both of my hands.
"I wanted your full attention." Then he just looks at me with those beautiful brown eyes.
"What?" I ask. He puts a finger to my lips, shushing me. I can help but smile.
"I just like looking at you. Your beautiful."
I can't reply to this, because now I know I'm very red. There's nothing I can say to top that.

NATS P.O.V.

Johnnie is very red now, but smiling. I lean in slowly, kissing him. I don't exactly pull away, but I rest my forehead against his, his eyes eventually wandering up to mine. How can he still make my stomach feel this way? As if im free falling. I want to do a lot more, but I just kiss him again. I can tell he wants more too. He tries to get entrance by biting my lip but I pull away. Instead I kiss the tip of his nose lightly and wrap my arms around him, squishing him into me. He's pouting.
"Let me kiss your face," he says, trying to pull out of my arms. I don't let him go.
"No. I want to hold you."
"Hold me while I kiss you," he tries to bargain.
"Nope." Then He growls at me. Literally growls. I laugh, "where did that come from?"
"My tortured, sexually frustrated soul." He whines. I laugh again. "Don't laugh at me!" He bites me, causing little stings of pain to shoot up my shoulder.
"Ow." He bites me again.
"Release me you-you....you devastatingly attractive asshole!" I just laugh again.
"If you bite me again I'm gonna moan loud enough that it'll wake up Richie." I say, laughing still.
"You wouldn't." He rolls over a little, smiling up at me.
"We won't know unless you do it," I taunt him.
"Well, Maybe I want you too." He says, awkwardly trying to come up with a comeback.
"Ooo." I wiggle my eyebrows at him, laughing. He joins in after a second. I let go of him, just a little, coming down to kiss him lightly. He tries to kiss me again, but I squish him to me in a hug again. He kisses my neck, the only place he can reach. At least he's not biting png me anymore. Honestly, that was turning me on quite a lot.
"Ugh. Why won't you let me do stuff." He kisses my neck again, aaaaand bites me softly.
"Ohh fuck Johnnie!" I moan, as loud as I can. He bursts out laughing, me laughing along.
"Fuck you." He says between laughter.
"Yes please." I laugh out.
He wiggles out of my arms, kissing me.
. I love you." He says, his words muffled against my chest.
"I love you too....you know I'll never leave you, right? So you can't leave me. Not like this." I lightly run my fingers up his arm, over the bandages. He nods, his face still between my shoulder and neck.
"Ok."