Fearlessly Fearful

How can I dive into myself if I am afraid of drowning? How can I look in the mirror if I am afraid of my own reflection?
Perhaps my biggest fear is to be afraid of something that might make me happy, instead of something that truly hurts me. To be afraid of love, and deeply attracted to pain. Perhaps I wasn't born to be fearful, for it should never be a part of me. However, it is. And right now the question that lays in my head is: "Will I ever be able to not be afraid?". I want to believe so, but I know that alone I will never make it. After all, it's hard to learn how to swim if someone doesn't tell you to keep kicking with your legs or know that your reflection is nothing but that if someone doesn't actually tell you. You can try alone, and you might even manage to do everything you'd want, but what's the fun in not seeing yourself achieving new goals?

-ccpandora