Behind The Fake Smiles

When I Kill Myself

When I kill myself
Don't you dare say
I loved you
Because if you did why didn't you tell me
When I was alive ?

Don't say I wish I could've seen the signs
Because the signs are more than obvious
Tear stained pillows
Bloodshot eyes
The way I'm starving myself but
When someone offers me food
I say no I'm not hungry
it's just another lie that you fell for

Don't call me a selfish person for ending my life
Pain is all I've felt

I just need someone to make me feel
Wanted
Loved
Important
Pretty
Smart
And everything that I'm not

Everyday I'm sinking
Deeper and deeper
I'm gasping for air
Screaming for someone to help me
But everyone just looks at me
Like I'm crazy
Or just simply ignore my cries

A voice whispered in my head
And told me the only way out
Is death
I did what the voice told me
And now
I'm free from all of this pain