The Exchange

Chapter 16

I lived when I came home the next morning. Barely.

I knew I was wrong. I should have gone home, talked to Viktor, given a little sympathy, but I didn't. There was no one to blame but me, and I accepted that.

I accepted being grounded with no phone for two weeks, but the third term of my punishment, I couldn't stomach. There was absolutely no way that I was going to write fifty personality traits, actions, or words of wisdom that I liked about Viktor by the time he left to go back to Sweden.

1. I like that when I'm with you, I'm not the dumbest person in the room.

I wanted to just ignore the rest of the list, but it was one of Mom's crazy ideas that wouldn't go away (funnily enough, so was Viktor). I only had forty-nine to go, and I thought that I had a pretty solid start, but weeks passed, and I was still stuck on number two.

By the beginning of October, I still only had the one reason on my list, and I came to the conclusion that I'd actually have to talk to him if I wanted to get it done.

I found him doing his math homework, and I put on the fakest smile I could manage. "Hey, Viktor."

He looked up at me. "Hi."

"What's going on? How's life? Do you miss Sweden?" I asked casually.

"Do you want something?"

"Just to understand you better. We've had our ups and downs–"

"Mostly downs," he interrupted.

"–but I think that if you try your best not to be an idiot, we can get along."

"We were getting along while you were ignoring me."

I nodded. "That's true, but where's the fun in that?"

"Do you like hating me?" he asked.

"What?"

"I don't think I ever did anything to you, but if I did, I'm sorry. You got what you wanted. Arti broke up with me." He sighed.

"If you're trying to make me feel guilty, it's not gonna work. I have no feelings."

"I'm not trying to do anything to you. I just want to coexist. That's it."

I bit my cheek. "Look, I guess I do too, but it just isn't going to work that way. So just tell me forty-nine good things about yourself, I'll write them down, and we'll never speak again. Sound good?"

"Why can't you try to get along with me?" he asked.

"Because at this point, it's just fun."

"Amanda, please. I'm tired of this."

I paused. "You-"

2. Congratulations on finally remembering my real name.

He looked at me. "I what?"

I turned away. "Nothing."

It was stupid of me to be happy that he remembered my name, but I was. I hated it.

"I have an idea. To understand each other better, we'll do an exchange," Viktor said.

"An exchange of what?" I asked.

"Information. That way, you don't feel like you're being nice to me since you're getting something in return."

I pondered the idea. "What kind of information?"

"Whatever you like. Stuff about school, stuff about you. You know, I really don't know that much about you."

"And that's how I want it."