Renewing our Vows

Chapter 1: Reminiscing

My heart was racing. I paced anxiously around the room, my fingers tapping to some unheard rhythm against my legs. I could hear the soft welcoming music through the large wooden doors as guests slowly filtered out onto the patio. I was beginning to feel ridiculous; we had already been married for 6 months and this ceremony was so over the top.

I wore a simple white satin gown that brushed the ground and then fanned out into a short train behind me. My hair was curled into big waves and gathered at the base of my neck into a low messy bun. Emma had decided it would complete the look to add baby's breath so she weaved it into my up-do and tucked my veil underneath my hair. I wore strappy silver sandals (because let's face it, I'm not about to wear heels in the grass and fall on my face).

I had to admit, I felt stunning and it was exciting to be able to have a real wedding to share with the most caring and gentle man I had ever known. As I looked in the mirror once more, my mind flashed back to when he had asked me to marry him once again.

... 5 months earlier ...

"Norma...?" Alex said sheepishly as we were sitting at the breakfast table on a beautiful Sunday morning, eating in silence. His tone took me off guard and I immediately looked up to meet his eyes. He looked so nervous that I became anxious.

"What is it?" I asked gently, turning my head to one side.

"I have something I want to ask you and I don't know how you're going to feel about it. Do you promise you won't laugh?" he asked quietly as he looked down at his hands.

"Of course I won't laugh," I said feeling a rush of relief coursing through my body. No matter how much he tells me he loves me or that he will never leave me, I'm always worried that one day he'll realize his mistake and walk away. But I still couldn't figure out what had him so on edge.

Suddenly, he stood up from his chair and walked around the table until he was standing in front of me.

He reached down and took my left hand in his, sliding my ring off my finger and sinking down on one knee. My heart stopped and I just sat there staring into his eyes. What the hell is he doing? I thought to myself as my heartbeat picked up in double time.

He reached one hand up to cup my cheek and traced his finger down my jaw as he spoke.

"Norma, I have been so desperately in love with you for so long now. I can't even remember my life without you and I never want to live another day without you by my side. I know our relationship didn't start off traditionally but I always dreamt of the day I would propose to you and since I never got the chance, I would like that to be today. Will you please be my wife again?"

I couldn't speak for a moment. What did I ever do to deserve this man? He was so absolutely perfect and always did exactly the right thing. Tears filled my eyes and as one spilled over onto my cheek, he quickly brushed it away with his thumb. He smiled at me but his eyes became wary. I realized several seconds had passed and I should say something but I still couldn't speak.

"Well?" he encouraged brushing my cheekbone with his fingers. Finally the words came to the surface.

"Oh my God, Alex!" I sobbed, "Of course I'll marry you again!"

He laughed breathlessly, tears filling his eyes and took my left hand in his hands once again, sliding my ring back into place. He leaned down to kiss the top of my hand. When his eyes met mine again, he cupped my face with both hands and kissed me eagerly. My hands clasped his wrists as I kissed him back hard, opening my mouth to his--

**knock, knock**

I was snapped out of my reverie suddenly as I heard a knock on the door. My eyes flew open.

"Hey mom, you almost ready?" Dylan said from behind the door.

"Yes honey, I'm ready. You can come in." I said, my voice a little husky from the memory.

He opened the door and stepped into the room, Emma following close behind. Dylan was wearing a charcoal suit and Emma wore a long strappy dusty rose dress that matched Dylan's tie perfectly. They looked so lovely together, it made me start to cry. Emma was already tearing up when she looked at me.

"You look absolutely radiant, Norma," she said wiping a tear from her cheek.

"Thank you sweetie. So do you! You two make a beautiful couple." I said back in a shaky voice. I was getting very nervous.

"Mom, you really do look amazing," Dylan said and walked over to hug me. That sent me completely over the edge. He rarely called me mom or showed me affection but lately, he has been reaching out more. Things finally began to feel like they were falling into place.

I sobbed against his shoulder, "Thank you, Dylan. You have no idea what that means to me. I love you so much."

"I love you too mom," he mumbled. "But you have to stop crying. It's time to go and you don't want to ruin your makeup," he said to me, holding me at arms length.

"Okay," I said trying to pull myself together. "Oh, do you know if Norman is coming?" I said, suddenly becoming nervous that he wouldn't want to be here.

"Yes, he's sitting in the front row with Dr. Edwards," Emma said with a smile and a wink.

Norman had been in Pineview for 6 months and was adjusting well there. Dr. Edwards said he was making a lot of progress and would be able to attend the vow renewal as long as he was with him. But the past couple days had been a little difficult for him and I wasn't sure he would make it.

"Thank you," I said trying to hold back my tears but failing. "Thank you both so much for all the support and love you have shown Alex and I."

"Of course, we love you guys." Emma said. Dylan gave me a small reassuring smile and nodded.

"Okay, it's time!" Emma said, suddenly becoming giddy. She hopped over to me and handed me my bouquet as I heard the music change outside.

I could no longer hear voices outside the doors so I knew everyone had taken their seats and were waiting for me. My hands started to shake as I thought of Norman sitting out there, probably staring daggers at Alex.

Emma gave my arm a light squeeze and then bent down to fix my train. Dylan whispered, "You're gonna do great," in my ear and kissed my cheek before he took my arm and prepared to walk me down the aisle. I was so touched that he would do this for me. Emma walked forward and opened both doors, grabbing her bouquet on her way out. She turned left to walk through the foyer and out onto the lawn.

"Breathe, mom," Dylan said, squeezing my hand.

Suddenly, the music changed again and I knew it was our queue to start.