Mixed are the emotions,
Scattered are the notions,
Jumbled are the thoughts,
Of feelings suppressed, feelings I forgot.
Stood by and watched the scene unfold,
"The way of reality," Society had told.
To change my clothes and cut my hair,
...
Slowly, I can feel my hold slipping away Being torn apart and replaced by her. They hung on to her every word, while mine, met with jeers and derision.
My voice annulled by traitorous followers. My whole image subordinate to hers, Being demolished and reconstructed by her social expedience.
Inferiority, a feeling I'm getting accustomed to.
Lost, alone... forsaken. Divested of my status. Whither am I bound? Am I bound to my heart that has been tainted with their cruel games? Or am I bound to my brain, my brain that has been manipulated by them.
I'm overwhelmed by a flurry of emotions that I can't yet decipher. So I pick at them, And the one in my reach that I have grasped comes in the know- Anger; It spreads like wild fire, It spreads like a disease. Anger at everyone, anger at her.
Outside, this Fiend, builds her disposition with fastidious care, But behind the scenes she's as ruthless as your worst nightmare. In a rage, I trashed my room, Ripping apart mercilessly at anything and everything in my vicinity. These unwary items lay waste in my wake. The detritus forming a trail behind me, Each piece representing a piece of my heart, Clawed apart.
I walk out, needing desperately to be alone. The lucid sunset can't cheer me up, instead, the light blinds me. The cool air stings my eyes. The hum of the city falls upon my inoperative ears. The atmosphere, suddenly too heavy, constricts my breathing. I take short gulps of air; in and out... in and out..
As nightfall approaches, the silence makes me deaf, Un-hearing. The blackness makes me blind, Unseeing. The surrounding creeps into my mind, making me give into the darkness,
Unfeeling.
So I yield beneath the starless night, In a prayer; In a plea for help set out to the Cosmos. In that vulnerable moment, My unwavering credence solidified furthermore. I became aware of everything, yet nothing.
A solitary spark became an uncontrollable flame, I vowed never to be struck down again. This revelation was reinforced as I became conscious of my surrounding. The wind began to howl, As if consecrating my idea of resurfacing, Twice as hard.
They can strip me of my dignity, my status and my fame. But they can't stop me now; it's time to Up My Game.
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A/N: Yes, this poem doesn't rhyme, But I wanted to try something new this time. I realize that it's been awhile, I've moved to a new country and it's gonna take me some time to get back in style.
So don't give up on me yet, I'm pleading, Thanks for everything and happy reading!
Thank you guys for reading what I wrote, Don't forget to comment and vote.
