Keeping Time

Chapter 11

Nicole Panera moved to Belgium in 2010. She attended the International School of Brussels. She left behind all her friends in Atlanta to start a new life in Europe. Within four years, she became a European. A "citizen of the world."

Mr. Panera works for UPS. It was because of this that the Panera family had to pack up and start a new life somewhere else.

Adjusting to the new move was difficult in the beginning.

Mrs. Panera would often make frequent rounds to and from the house to buy groceries, or to the laundromat to do the laundry. Despite busying herself with a task, she never interacted much with those around her.

It started to estrange her from Mr. Panera, who felt as if he shouldn't simply entertain her himself. Perhaps it was this, plus a combination of Nicole's brother Henry estranging himself from the family and engaging with the wrong crowd, to Taylor immediately accepting the French culture and leaving America, that led Nicole to feel more outcasted from her family than ever. Perhaps that is what led her to Joseph during her freshman year of college.

What was it about Joseph that Nicole loved so much? Perhaps it was that he was a senior and it made her feel more mature to talk to him than to her more immature peers. It could have been the ability he had to entertain her. He seemed to know a lot of the subjects she was interested in.

Nicole hardly ever saw Henry while attending ISB. He was a sophomore when she started her freshman year. ALready, Henry was associating himself with a bad crowd - a group of guys who thought it was better to mistreat women rather than treat them with respect. She would hear the words they joked to each other at the school assemblies like "Boo! She's such a whore" and "Did you see that dress she wore last night? She was asking for it."

Nicole started to get more interested in the arts. More particularly: drawing and advanced literature classes where they read DIckens, Hugo, and other classic literary authors.

She liked her European History class a lot. She also joined the anime club. Nicole met a few friends at ISB, and things were manageable for the most part.

Then when her sister Taylor joined the upper school at ISB, she was friends with almost every girl in her grade including the Japanese exchange students. She was mastering languages much faster than Nicole ever could. Taylor could already speak German, French, Russian and a little Japanese.

Mr. and Mrs. Panera were proud of Taylor. They would point to her and say to Nicole, "Look! We didn't bring you children over to Europe to write stories and novels. Henry is already acing every subject in school. Taylor knows four languages. What about you Nicole? You spend your time roleplaying with people online. We take you on trips to other countries and instead, you don't appreciate them. You waste your time with video games on your phone but now, everything will be different in college. You are going to major in Engineering because you have the grades for it, and your minor will be in Mandarin Chinese so you can learn a little from your brother and sister in what we ourselves have failed in teaching you."

She was angry when they said this, but there was nothing to be done. Since her parents were going to fund her college education, it was better than being homeless. Plus, Nicole was ready to go back to America. She would do whatever it took.

After her graduation from high school, she began her college studies. In her Chinese class, She met Alexis, Nicholas, Diana, and Joseph. Alexis had lived in many countries in her life and her father was the US ambassador to Belgium. Nicholas had lived in Shanghai, Tahiti, Indonesia and many other countries in Asia. Diana never even traveled outside the country, and it was unclear as to why she was interested in Chinese because she never spoke. Then there was Joseph.

Joseph...

We felt familiar to each other immediately. We laughed and joked together. Soon, we began to hang out all the time. He was visiting from America to take some classes. His father worked as Secretary of State. Nicole didn't know this. She only liked him for who he was and his concern for the world. Some of his ideas of Marxism were a little surprising, but she could see the reason he entertained it was because he was concerned about poverty around the world. He was angry about his father that estranged himself from his mother, fell in love with a French woman and moved both him and his brother to Belgium. Joseph was also interested in Buddhism. He would invite Nicole to meditate with him at Henri Georges Park. Then, they would be fooling around on the playground and/or eating together at local pubs. He invited Nicole to his house one night, and she accepted.

It was a dark night when she was walking to his house. The moon was hanging beautifully overhead. Joseph greeted Nicole at the door with his shirt off. He reeked of alcohol. She entered. Now she scolded herself. Could he be able to remember this? She should have known what she was getting herself into. No matter. She joined him on the bed. Placed her head on his chest, right next to his heart. This was where she wanted to be.

It was so casual the way Nicole said it.

"We can."

"You're sure?

"I'm sure."

Then the two of them were fumbling at each others' clothes. It seemed as if they were meant to be together all along.

Their relationship was too intense. They were crazy for each other during the summer and taught each other things that could never be unlearnt.

How did it fall out?

Joseph was done with college and was heading back to America. He was to attend UCLA in California. It was his dream to be near the sound and surf, among New Age and philosophical people. People who shared his worldview and whom would inspire him to grow as an individual. She was happy for him.

"I promise to keep in touch."

There was nothing that could be done to prevent them from breaking up. It came out of the blue.

"I think we should stop seeing each other."

Lots of crying. She didn't know what was going on. It's so rare to meet someone who shares your thoughts about life. Someone older whom can be a mentor. Joseph had the most memorizing eyes. They seemed to analyze everything she did. He was the most beautiful thing in the world, and now he was gone.

She could not help but remember all the fun times they had. Here is the library where we laughed together. Here is the park where we laid under the trees, not saying a word, just enjoying each other's company.

Perhaps she pushed him away because she was worried he would soon be leaving. Maybe she was needy like he said. He stopped talking to her. He would never talk to her again. Nicole spiraled into a depression. What could get her out of it?

Taylor joined Chinese class that fall.

Professor Liu came to class one day and announced a study abroad trip to Shanghai. Nicole was ready to leave the country behind and everything that reminded her of Jopseh.

Mr. Panera called that afternoon and said, "Guess what? We are going to pay for you to study abroad in China this summer with your sister."

Mrs. Panera piped in, "Yeah. Now is a perfect time for you to bond more closely with your sister.

Nicole rolled her eyes.

It was decided. She was going to China this summer whether she wanted to or not.