Let your hair down

Knots

  Being alone in a tower wasn't as bad as you'd think. Mom wasn't telling me to get a medicine. She wasn't around to say "I love you baby, but....you need help! You're not physchotic like your father and sister, and I'm not letting you turn out like them! So,-"
That's when I'd tell her to NOT compare me to dad. Harley has her reasons for loving the Joker, and I won't use that against her. However, the only thing dad ever did was cook for us and yell at us to fight our battles. His motto was
Start the fight and finish it!
He wasn't like most good parents. He was crazy and wild. And he taught Ianthe so much trash and she believed every word of it till this day. I'd say that's why she is what she is. Dads completely different from Harley. Harley's crazy because of love. That's when I tell mom to leave Harley out of this.
Mom and I never argued. I was always the shy sweet girl. Whenever mom would get on my nerves, I would tell Eugene and he would comfort me. Eugene was.....is....gone now. I couldn't deal with this anymore. I had to get out of that house. I'd love to go back, to see my sisters and fix my relationship with mom. Someday. When I'm ready.

The tower wasn't as boring as I thought it would be. Then again, I have a big family, so I crave peace and quiet. To a point.
After a while, I started to miss everyone.
If I went back now I would just burden them.
Mom would say she was sorry and would try to make everything better. Then she'd say "I can't help you but maybe a doctor can,"
That's when is mention that Harley was a doctor. Mom would then say that she was too far gone to ever be one again.
Harley would want me to join the Jokers gang. Nowadays, I'm not really much of a joiner. I hear Ianthe is hanging out with them. If Ianthe can finally fit in, then I don't want to screw that up for her.
Barry would tell me to lock myself back up while his kids would beg me to stay.
Matt just graduated high school, so everyone would be busy celebrating him anyway.
That's what would happen. Maybe, I'll never be able to go back. That's when I allowed my self to cry.

My days weren't very exciting I spent most of my time reading or brushing my hair. Did I mention my hair? I've always loved long hair so I never cut mine. Ever. It's not even that long. It comes past my butt and I'm short so...yeah. It takes forever to wash. Eugene use't to have to get in the tub with me to help me wash it. Which really didn't bother me.
It does get tangled easy and takes forever to brush. It keep my busy. The more busy I am the less depressed I feel. The less likely I feel like I shouldn't be her anymore. There's less time to think.
I tie my hair in knots everyday because of it.

"Stop. Just relax. Let your hair down, that's what they all say. I'm trying. I'm trying....so hard.... I let my hair down everyday literally," and tie it in knots but I keep that part to myself as I explain everything to my mom. She called me this month.
   "Sweetheart, maybe make some friends. Put yourself out there, come home! Please let,-" I cut her off saying is just be a burden, to make her hang up I tell her that's I do have friends and see them everyday. She believed the lie. She never could read me anyway.
   That's when I heard the crash and the boy fell thru the window and into my room

A/N: thank you all so much for reading. Let me know what you think about this story. This is my first fan fiction so I'd love to hear feedback. I will do my best to update at least once a week. On weekends I'll probably be able to update more. I will also be updating my poetry book whenever a poem comes to mind. That one is also most likely be once a week but probably more , since I'm constantly writing poems. Lol.
Once again hope you all have a great day! And be happy! :)