It's Jesus

God's package

                                                  

Never been in my life that God veils His grace, to be hidden for me. No, it never happened. Like even once. Every day, it has been filled with such glorious things, a Sovereign Lord would do. I can still clearly remember, except the fact that I did really try reminiscing out a while ago, that, it was on Monday morning. Alyssa, my classmate, well, kind of one of my closest friend, gave me this really cute thing an introvert like me would receive. She handed me a letter written in a sheet where the borders' edges had been burned on its surface. It is a whole lot like a vintage style letter, with, of course, my favorite verse "PSALM 37:4: was being scrawled over on a separate sheet—in a most creative way.

 It was sealed in a white envelope with seals of watermelon icon scattering around. She said that I should be opening it as soon as I reached the house, but I can't help seeing it unopened, that is why at the school I opened it already. The afternoon after that I went home. As soon as I reached my room, I am caught by something that weakens me inside. It's about choosing my school, I think, or for some reasons, I wept because of this dreams inside I couldn't reach because I lack financial security or whatever there is. So, I was actually crying. Sometimes, I ask God what really His plan to me. I kind of doubted His plans that time. The thing is, I really want to enroll, for my senior year next year, somewhere in the city.

 The time I heard that it isn't certain yet, I actually cried. (I am so weak, that is why I always need God's grace and guidance). I prayed that moment that no matter what, it is under His plans. I always believe that he is better than mine. Who else has the best anyway? I remembered that Alyssa gave me something, so after the whole time I became discouraged by a thing that doesn't meet my expectations, I tried pulling it up from my bag. I slowly realized that the whole message, plus the kind of warning Alyssa told me early in the morning about not opening it until I get home, was a whole plan after all. 

This, God, knows that by the time I get home, I'll be crying because my Mom will be going to tell me something, clearly that would break my heart. The, of course, not sending me to the school I want because it doesn't meet our financial savings. The whole supposed-to-be-set up was just bent because I didn't listen to Alyssa at the very first place. And another thing is, I kind of forgot that Jesus is the rock in which I stand that I ended up asking Him what was it all about, His plans, that I couldn't see it at all working good. 

That is also a sort of reason why that verse is timely given by Alyssa to me. I just watched the letters being written in a sheet of white paper, filled with color, that miraculously changed my state of mind. I became aware that God answered my prayer instantly. He said that "Delight yourself in Me, and I will give you desires of your heart". It is actually my favorite verse in the bible too! God, was just absolutely amazing on giving me satisfaction in comfort through His words that are always alive. 

Though the school I desired didn't fit to His will, because I am staying at the same school as I used to have my junior years, I still know that it is still my hidden desire to be here that made Him set that out because I know He has something for me here worth staying for. He again, let me know that He isn't oblivious that what is happening to me because of any sort, He is always there, always and forever. He taught me a couple of lessons that day. First, is to wait until things as its fullest, will come. Like the part where I shouldn't be opening the letter until it's time, I think it's going to be grander than that. Second, is that His plan takes place in His time. We all know that God time zone is clearly different than ours. So we might, sometimes, think that He isn't listening because the answer didn't come yet, but it is certain that He is just still setting some for the right things to be set out in the fullness of His time. Because you know, one day for us is a thousand years to Him. 

I'm always get overwhelmed with that thought up until now. (insert the verse of that in here please). That day also, God never failed to make things well that to this day I am thankful I haven't worked out that school I always wanted to be in, because I know for sure, my prayer of His perfect will is still being planned by Him until now. By this time, I'm still going to be patient and endure praying that no matter what, His Will will prevail. This is maybe what that verse is all about, delighting myself in Him. Unlocking the feeling of desire of something I never thought I would have until I did pray for it. Nevertheless, I am continually waiting for that revelation on where I am leading to. I am pretty certain that things didn't worked out as I want them to be because He has prepared me much good and probably beyond just what I used to desire at first.

It happened only in one day, I inform you. But it seems that lesson goes on and on. With all of those divine comfort He did to me, I have sought that He is a God who is really close to the broken hearted as being said in the bible, "The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." - Psalm 34:18. 

So, why would I worry about other things now? This is honestly simple, but I found it huge already! And I guess, I just touched a tip of an iceberg in God's goodness, how much more for the days to come? And, as they say, huge things come in small packages. Well, for me, God's grace is fully packed with lots and lots of packages and sometimes it comes in pretty crafty style too!