Speak Now (Jughead x Reader)

Speak Now, Part 9 (Jughead x Reader)

"Have a good night!" You ushered the last partygoer out of the house, shutting the door with satisfaction.

You turned back to the trash and stains littering Fred Andrews's living room, sighing.

"It's the nature of the beast," Archie said, reading your mind. He stumbled throughout the room with a trash bag, picking up cans and bottles and throwing them inside.

You grabbed the bag from him. "Go to sleep, Andrews. You're wasted."

He pointed a finger. "So are you!"

You smirked. "At least I can take two steps without falling over. Bed, now."

Archie pouted ambling towards the stairs. You smiled sweetly, patting his head. "Sleep tight, best man."

You enjoyed the newfound solitude, the only sound the crinkling of the trash bag and the clinking of the bottles inside. You were never one for big parties, though you'd frequented a few with Jughead during high school to disparage the crowd and score free booze.

Something about this party had felt different. It became all too clear that you weren't drunk teenagers anymore. Your feelings for Jughead never changed, but he was getting married. In days, his life would never be the same. Your relationship would never be the same.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

You looked up from your work to see Jughead leaning against the doorway. "How did the man of the hour enjoy his party?" You asked, masking your confused expression with a sly grin.

"Archie might be my opposite in nearly every way imaginable, but he sure knows how to throw a party." Jughead went to help you, grabbing some cans at his feet. When he went to put them in your trash bag, your hands touched and you flinched.

"Listen," Jughead said. "I'm sorry if I ruined your night. I don't know what came over me."

You trained your eyes on the floorboards. "It's fine."

Jughead grabbed your chin, tilting it up so your eyes met his. You felt a blush creeping up your neck. "It's not fine, (Y/N)." He bit his lip. "Whenever you start talking to other guys I turn into this huge asshole and I have no idea why."

Maybe you're, I dunno, jealous? You bit back the thought. "You're probably just stressed about the wedding, Jug. I know you still want it to be you and me, but it's going to be you and Betty, no matter how much you want it to still be you and me."

"Why does it have to only be one or the other?" Jughead asked.

Because I'm fucking in love with you. "I'm a girl, you're a guy. Betty is bound to get jealous, and I'm not about to be the girl who creates problems for your marriage." Unless you want me to be.

Jughead raked his hands through his hair, groaning. "It's always about what Betty wants. Ever since we started dating it's like I don't even matter. It's always about her family, her career, her wedding. Even when it's about me or my problems, she doesn't even listen to what I want and tries to solve everything her way. It's never about what I want."

You looked into Jughead's eyes. It was the kind of gaze you couldn't look away from, where you felt so incredibly vulnerable and strong at the same time.

"What do you want, Jughead?"

Jughead returned your gaze, sad and confused. "I don't know." He sat on the stairs, putting his head in his hands. "I've never been given the choice, before."

You put down the bag, sitting next to him and hugging him, pouring all of your love into his body. Right now, you weren't the girl who was in love with Jughead. You were the girl who was Jughead's best friend. And Jughead needed a best friend right now.

"That's not good, Jug," you whispered.

"I know," Jughead said.

"What makes you happy, Jug?" You asked.

Jughead had taken your hand and was playing with your fingers absentmindedly. "You," he said.

You blushed, smiling.

"And Archie, and Betty, and even Veronica, sometimes. Jellybean and my mom and dad..."

Your blush receded. You felt silly for thinking it would have only been you. "Is Betty the person who makes you the most happy out of everyone, in the whole world?"

Jughead looked away. "I don't know."

"Jughead," you said. "Getting married is a big deal. It's not like you and Betty just have a wedding and things go back to normal."

Jughead's eyes narrowed. "I know what marriage means, (Y/N)."

Your expression did not waver. "Do you, Jughead? Do you really?"

He sighed. "I do. I just... don't know what love means. I think I love Betty. But I'm not sure."

You rubbed Jughead's shoulder consolingly. This whole time, you'd blamed Jughead for not seeing your feelings, resenting him for choosing Betty. But it was becoming exceedingly clear that even he did not know what was in his best self-interest.

"When you love someone," you whispered. "You know."

"How?" Jughead asked.

"They're your person," you said. "You can't even imagine spending the most important moments of your life with anyone else. When you go home every night, they're who you want to see." You tightened your hand around his. "Love isn't a feeling that you spend your whole life searching for. It's a choice. It's choosing that person, again and again. And being happier for it." Even when that person is getting married to somebody else, and there's no hope of you ever being together.

Jughead leaned into you. "Have you ever been in love, before?"

You froze. This is your chance. "...yes."

Jughead raise his eyebrows. "With who?"

You suddenly devolved into a stammering mess. "With... uh, someone I met at school."

Jughead's expression darkened. "Oh."

You felt an idea forming in your head. "It never worked out, though."

"Why?"

You met his eyes. "He got together with someone else."

Jughead frowned. "I'm sorry."

You leaned into him, holding on tighter. "It's okay."

"Whoever he is, he must be a huge idiot," Jughead said, a sour expression on his face.

You chuckled. "Why do you say that, Jug?"

He looked at you, a serious expression on his face. "Any guy would be insane to have the chance to be with you and not want to be with you forever."

You suddenly realized how close your faces were. You could feel the warmth of his breath on your skin, the faint smell of alcohol along with it. His arms were around you and he was so close. So close you could see into his blue eyes and see every day of the rest of your lives.

Your faces inched closer together when Jughead froze.

"We, uh, should get home," Jughead said, backing away.

You nodded, stamping down the pounding in your heart. "Yeah."

The two of you finished cleaning up and walked back to Jughead's apartment in silence. Only one thought played in your mind, again and again.

Had Jughead just tried to kiss you?