Being a Rockstar's Girl.

Disposable Teens

-Two months have passed and everyone is settled.

I heard a knock on the door and walked down the stairs to get it. "Cara?" She jumped excitedly in front of me. "Brilliant idea!" She screeched and pushed past me into the house.

"And that is?" I motioned for her to continue. "You can sing, I can sing and play the keyboard, Cal can play the bass, Andy can play the drums, and Brenda can play the guitar. I say we have ourselves a band!" My eyes widened. I got extremely excited. "Call the girls, I'll go get Cal and Brenda!" She nodded and got on her phone. I ran upstairs and into all the rooms."Get up! Get down stairs!" I yelled into each room.

About thirty minutes later we had all the girls sitting in my living room. We explained everything and began talking about band names. "Heaven's Rejects." Cal said. "Satan's Rejects." I laughed at Cara's proposal. "Either way we are rejects." I said. Everyone laughed. "Hell's Rejects?" Asked Brenda. We agreed on that.

We all walked into the studio upstairs.

"We need lyrics." Andy groaned. I nodded. "Nikki writes songs all the time." Cal said. I nodded. "I have one." I continued. "Don't make fun of it okay?" Everyone agreed with my rule. "You have a beat?" Cara asked. I nodded.

I went and got my journal. "Sing it!" Everyone chanted. I took a deep breath and began. (This is my song that I wrote, please don't take it.)

"I'm here... Just crying, still screaming. I need your help, I'll deny it, but I know it. I know I'm still falling. I want you here, the darkness is just too consuming. But I'll hold it back. I'll hold it back. Hold it back. You won't ever listen to me, no you've never heard my pleas. Your not gonna help me. You've always refused to see the pain, the pain I hide. But I'll hold it back, I'll hold it back, hold it back. I plaster that smile on my face, I fake my laugh like always. I hold back the tears, I hold them back. Won't let em fall, let them fall. I'll hold it back. I'll hold it back.  I don't want your sympathy and I don't need it. I want your love and I know I do. But I won't ever ask, I won't say I need you, but that doesn't mean I don't need someone.  I'll keep holding it back, holding it back. Holding it back, holding it back. Just keep holding it back. Holding it back." I stopped singing and looked at everyone. Their jaws hung open. "That was amazing!" Brenda screamed. I blushed.

"So is it agreed? Our first song?" Cal asked. I looked around and everyone nodded. I smiled brightly. "So Nikki, is our new singer AMD song writer. That alright with you Nikki?" Cara asked. I nodded. A huge smile still on my face.

We practiced the lyrics, Cara and I sang it as a duet.  I was so happy, this is what I needed. I needed to be a part of something, something that would change things, change people. Change my future.