The Bond

Ch. 2 My Darkness

I huddled down into the raggedy, navy blue blanket. It did nothing to help with the cold. Even in the unlit trailer, I could see my breath. Puffing out like smoke from the fire I didn't have. I wished the darkness would just swallow me into an eternal abyss, where I could be free of this. I had tried so many times. First to escape the trailer, then to escape from this world. There was nothing to keep me here, nothing here for me but pain. The men were more careful now, they made sure to keep anything sharp well away from me. I had found out that even paper, when folded just right, could be used. I lay my head on the grey vinyl floor and curled into a small ball. My handcuf rattled as I put my hands imbetween my stomach and legs. The ice cold metal bit into my skin, going straight through my thin undershirt. It was the only clothes I have had since this nightmare began. It felt like it had been years of darkness, but I was sure it hadn't been longer than a few months. At the moment it seemed the men had stopped somewhere again for supplies.

Why, why, why? I went down the list of who was to blame. The adoption agency, for giving me to the brown haired man and his 'wife'. The kind old woman, for dying too soon. My mother, for being the first to abandon me, before I could even get to know her. Me, for being naive enough to trust the brown haired man. For being the reason my mother abandoned me, for others abandoning me. This was how the list went, day after day. Sometimes finding more people I could blame, but always realizing I'm the one who really was to blame, for everything.

The brown haired man and the blonde man were coming back. Maybe once they finish with me, they will be pleased enough to give me some food. I curled up tighter, becoming as small as possible.