The nanny Diaries

CHAPTER SEVEN

THE NANNY DIARIES

Three days later, just as I bend over to pick up the grubby little sneaker Grayer has hurled into the Xes' marble entryway, the front door slams behind me with a loud bang. I jerk upright, still holding his shoe.

   "Shit"

   "I heard you! You said 'Shit.' You said it!" Muffled sounds of a gleeful Grayer make their way through the heavy door.
   I steady my voice and reach for a low, authoritative octave.
"Grayer, open the door."

   "No! I can stick my finger out at you and you can't see. I got my thung thitikin out, too." He's sticking his tongue at me.
   Okay, options. Option One, knock on crotchety-matron-across-the-way's door. Right, what am I going to do then? Call Grayer? Invite him over for tea? His little fingers sweep out beneath the door.

   "Nanny, try and catch my finger! Do it! Do it! Come on, catch 'em!" I concentrate every muscle on not step on them.

   Option Two, go down to the doorman and get extra keys. Right.
By the time he finishes describing this to Mrs. X not even Joan Crawford would hire me.

   "You're not even playing! I'm going to go take a bath. So don't ever come back here, okay? My mom said you don't ever have to come back." His voice gets quieter as he starts to move from the door. "Going to get I'm the tub."

   "GRAYER!" I scream before I catch my breath. "Don't walk away from this door. Ummm, I have a surprise out here for you." Option Three, wait until Mrs. X gets home and tell her the truth: her son is a sociopath. But just as I settle on Option Three, the elevator door slides open and Mrs. X, her neighbor, and the doorman all step out.

   "Nanny? Naaanny, I don't want your surprise. So go away. Really, really, go, get put of here." Well, at least we've all been updated. With a few "ahems" the neighbor let's herself into her apartment and the doorman hands off the package he's been carrying and disappeared back into the elevator. 

   I hold up Grayer's shoe.
   As if for a studio audience, Mrs. X whips out her keys and proceeds to remedy the situation. "Well, then. Let's get this door open!" She laughs and unlock the door. But she swings it open a little too quickly and catches one of Grayer's fingers.

   "AHHhhhhhh. Nanny broke my hand! AAAAAHhhhhh--my hand is broke. Get out of HEEERRrrreeee! GooOOOOoooo!" He throws himself onto the floor, sobbing, lost in grief.

   Mrs. X bends down, as if about to hold him, then straightens up. "Well, looks like you really Tuckered him out at the park! You can go on ahead. I'm sure you have a ton of homework to do. We'll see you Monday, then? I reach carefully inside the doorway and put his shoe down in exchange for my backpack.

   I clear my throat. "He just threw his shoe and I----"
   At the sound of my voice Grayer let's out a fresh wail.
"LEEAAAVVE! Ahhahhha." She stares down at him as he writhes on the floor, smiles broadly, and pantomimes that I should get the elevator. "Oh, and Nanny, C-a-i-t-l-i-n won't be returning, but I'm sure you have to hang of everything by now."

I close their door and am alone again in the now familiar vestibule. I wait for the elevator and listen to Grayer scream. I feel as though the whole world is sticking its tongue at me.

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Keep your nose out of it, Nanny Drew." My father slurps the last drop of his wonton soup. "You never know. Maybe this Caitlin had another job lined up."