Of Scissors And Scooby Doo

Chapter 5

No one could even imagine how glad I was that my first week at Hollywood Arts was officially over and the weekend rolled around, promising me time for myself, time to shut off my head. Like I promised her, I stayed away from Jade as best as I could with, you know, both of us hanging around the same group of people.

I'll be honest. I thought about going back to Sherwood, to just... forget that I ever saw Jade again because... because it hurt. A lot. It wasn't supposed to be like this. We're Jade & Tori. We shouldn't be acting like we're strangers because we're not. But whatever, it is what it is. No need to dwell on things...

Aside from Jade, the first week at Hollywood Arts was... interesting, with a lack of a better word to say. From having to do the Bird Scene to customizing my locker... this school was really something else. So like I said, I was glad when the weekend came so that I could get my mind off of school stuff and most importantly, get my mind off of Jade.

Let me just say that it didn't work out.

My head was always with her, no matter what I did. I thought back to the conversation we had in her room. I thought about what she had told me, that it hurt to talk to me. That she... wanted to forget me. The fact that she even thought about forgetting me stung, I can't deny that, but... she didn't succeed. She didn't answer my question when I asked her but that was kind of answer enough, don't you think? I think it still hurt. She was still feeling that pain she had felt when she cut all strings with me because she thought it was for the best. And she's hurt that she couldn't just go back to the way we were before she moved to San Francisco, just like I was. But I knew I couldn't take that pain away from her. Or rather... I could, but I knew she wouldn't let me. So I did what she wanted me to do.

I stayed away from her, only talked to her when it was really necessary.

For two weeks.

It was hard, let me tell you that. But it was what Jade wanted and being the pathetic loser I am, I would do anything for her. I respected her wish, even if it really wasn't what I wanted. Although she still refused to talk to me normally – not counting her snappy and actually pretty hurtful remarks – and she sometimes even refused to acknowledge the fact that I existed, I could still see that I wasn't just anybody to her, as much as she wanted me to believe that. I'd see her look at me, out of the corner of my eye at lunch, for far longer than it was deemed appropriate for someone who claimed to not be interested at all in me.

And today... today really got the wheels in my head working.

It was lunchtime and I slowly made my way into the Asphalt Café. When I got there however, I almost turned back around when I saw that only Beck and Jade were sitting at our usual table. I have to admit, I was kind of jealous of Beck. He could always be with Jade whenever he wanted to, without her complaining even the slightest bit. And although they fought a lot – seriously, I think there were only four or five days in the three weeks I've been here where they didn't fight about the smallest of things – they were also... affectionate with each other, to the point where I simply wanted to barf. I mean sure, they could kiss each other as much as they wanted but did they really have to do it in front of me? I didn't think so. Not that I was saying I was jealous of Beck being able to-... whatever. I'm not going to dive into that topic. So anyway, I decided that I shouldn't feel forced to turn around to avoid Beck and – more importantly – Jade. Why would I? Jade didn't control my life, I could do whatever I wanted. So I walked up to them with as much confidence I could muster, even smiling in what I think was kind of a provocative manner when Jade looked up at me. "Hey guys!"

Beck lifted his chin in some sort of greeting and motioned for me to sit down. "Hey, come sit." I did so and saw Jade rolling her eyes. "Does she have to sit here?" she asked with a glare directed at her boyfriend who in turn just raised his eyebrows and affirmed her question, making her eyes roll again. Beck and I began talking about the homework assignment Sikowitz gave us while Jade ignored us both for the most part, glaring down at her salad and continuously stabbing it aggressively. Well, someone got anger issues. After a couple of minutes Andre and Cat joined us, followed by Robbie who also appeared after a while. "So did you find a good present for Trina?"