Soul Connection (Damon and Elena)

Chapter 1

It's intense. It's all consuming. It's Damon Salvatore. When I catch his eye, his stare burns right into me and I can't breathe, I can't move, I only know that I want him. It's the most real thing I've ever felt in my entire life, so real that it scares me. I tried to fight it, but my heart caught up with me and I know now that it's useless to resist.

**

It's night. It's dark. It's cold. Perfect environment for a vampire like myself. Though my current situation is anything but perfect. I'm weighed down by intense nervousness.

I wrap a lock of hair around my finger and twirl it nervously with my left hand and with my right, I chew my nails endlessly. I look like a wreck standing in front of Damon's door, because I know what I'm about to do, and I know I'm going to regret it. ---But it's the only way to save him.

Allow me to tell you what happened from the beginning. You see, there is this guy name Markos, who is the human embodiment of "the universe", and he cast a spell to make Stefan my true love. And something about that doesn't sit right with me. What if I don't want a fairy tale romance? What if I don't want to be forced on who to love? What if I want to be with someone who makes me feel alive-- someone like Damon Salvatore.

I shake my head quickly and empty the thoughts of desire from my mind. As much as we are hopelessly attracted to each other, we just can't ever work. I can't seem to move past the terrible things that he's done, so instead I choose to ignore them. Our relationship is unhealthy but my relationship with Stephan is stale and expired.

You see my dilemma? Stephan lets me know that I am loved, safe, and secure with him. He's sweet and kind and in all ways unremarkable.

But Damon, he's different. I feel loved, safe, and free. Like the limitations in life are endless and I can do anything, be anything. He inspires me in a way I've never been before. He gives me that creative and adventurous spark that I never knew I could have.

God, he hides his true goodness because he doesn't want to live up to anyone's expectations-- as he's told me. Only me.

Just thinking of that breathtaking night makes my heart skip a beat. The night he revealed to me why he was the way he was. I don't think he's ever said it out loud before. "When people see good, they expect good. And I don't want to have to live up to anyone's expectations". I remember my mind racing and my heart beating impossible fast when he told me this, staring intently into my eyes. He knew that I accepted him and understood him. All the same ways he understands me. I could tell what he was thinking and I could feel his heart beat when our hands touched. I knew at that moment that I needed him in my life because there is no one else that has ever come close to make me feel that way. This deep passion that I crave, even when I fight it.

But Markos wants to take that away from me. He wants everything to be the way it's "supposed" to be. He wants everything to be in balance, because being in love with Damon is disrupting nature.

His brain works logically-- but only logically. Never sympathetically, or doing what's right. Just doing what "needs" to be done. And in this case it's erasing Damon from the picture.

So unless I erase him from the picture, he will. I think you can already guess that Markos would easily kill Damon without a second thought. So... breaking his heart to save his life, is worth the price. If he died, I don't know what I'd do with myself.

"Come in!" Damon's voice booms from the other side of the room.

I walk in nervously. I'm not sure how to say what I'm going to say-- mostly because I don't want to say it.

I give him a small smile. I can see by the look on Damon's face he immediately knows something is wrong.

"Elena?" He asks, his eyebrows furrowing. "What is it?" He asks, though it sounds more like a statement than a question.

"Well.." I say my voice low and quiet. Im staring at the ground, I can't bring myself to meet his eyes. I can't believe I'm going to do this to him.

"Elena" He says, like he knows something bad is coming already. "Look at me," He gently tilts my chin up so we lock eye contact. His voice is deep, and the sexual tension between us is so thick you could cut it with a knife. I stare back at him, his eyes penetrating mines. My lip quivers. I can't breathe.

All I want to do is kiss him. But I can never do that again.

"I can't.." I say, my voice cracking. "I'm so sorry." Tears start forming in my eyes.

Damon's expression is unreadable. A twisted combination of sympathy, fear, and sadness.

"We can't be.." I start, but I stare at the ground, unsure of how to word this. "We can't be together anymore . We need to stay away from each other."

I prepare myself for his reaction.

"But... we just started. I don't understand." His voice cracks, and he sounds desperate and hurt. I look away, I hate to see him like this. "Is this because of Stefan?" He asks.

"No!" I exclaim, and then sigh. "It's just about me and you."

"But why?" He asks.

"I don't know how to answer that..." I say, tears streaming down my face now.

"This doesn't make sense." He says, and looks at me hard. "You're hiding something from me. And I know it because," he walks towards me and cups my face in his hands. "I know you Elena." I stare up at him through my sad eyes and purse my lips. I shake my head, nodding.

"Okay." My voice cracks. We both stare at nothing in silence, as he slowly lets his hands tug on my hair.

"You said that when it's real you can't walk away." He says in his low voice, staring at the ground. He slowly turns his gaze back up to me, and I can't bear it the pain in his eyes.

I nod. "You know that I can never walk away." I whisper just as quietly.

"So why are you doing this?" He exclaims.

I release a tear and it rolls down my face. The intensity of this moment is too much for me. My face is growing hotter and my palms are sweatier than ever. "I can't explain it but I need you to remember one thing, if nothing else remember this..." The next tear comes rushing down. "Im in love with you now and I always will be. I love you so much it hurts." I say. "No matter what happens, don't forget that."

"Elena!" He exclaims. He holds my face. "I love you so much too, you know I do. So please.. You have to tell me what you're hiding from me."

"I want to.. God I want to tell you so bad. But I can't." I let out a shaky breath. "I'm so sorry damon." I say to him, though I felt like I was apologizing to myself.

With that, I run out of his room, not wanting to further see his sadness that I know I have caused. I'm a terrible person-- I know.

But I'd rather be a terrible person than have him dead. Does that sound familiar? Yeah, I've inherited some personality traits from damon. I'll do anything to protect him as much as he would for me.

I run through outside and the cold night air hits me by surprise. Just earlier today it was warm and sunny. Now it's like an iceberg. The cool air feels good against my hot skin and it calms me little, but the pain crawling at my heart isn't easily fixed at all.

I'm not religious, but at this moment I'm praying to God that this nightmare will not last.

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