My love for Loki

Nightmares

Six months ago. that's when my life turned upside down. That's when Loki attacked New York and tried to kill me. The nightmares started to get better but that al ended when a certain God came to live in stark towers. I wake up to a knock on my door, I look at the clock only to see its 8 a.m., I only got four hours of asleep. like I said the nightmares are getting better but not always.
"come in" I see Tony walk in, he's like my older brother. Him, Steve and Sam have been helping since but it's still a work in progress.
"hey sleeping beauty we need you in the kitchen"
"it better not be for me to make breakfast"
"ha I wish nope, something more" I groan but stand up. I follow behind him only to stop when I see Loki sitting at the island. I start to back up but I hit what feels like a brick wall. I look up to see Steve behind me, he smiles softly at me before leading me over to the island. I curl up in my seat and turn my gaze to the coffee that was placed in front of me. its dead silent until Steve breaks the silence
"Ok, I know we don't want Loki here but Fury made it very clear that he is part of the Avengers now" the arguments break out, I quietly slip away with my coffee and head to the library. I fail to notice a pair of green eyes follow me.
Ever since that day I've been avoiding Loki, at first, I would leave if he entered or not answer him if he asked me questions, and even not even acknowledge he was there. one day that all changed when I heard his inner monologue of how he was treated when him and thor were younger. how he was always in Thors shadow. how he was an outcast. I felt bad for him, I understand that, always living in my older sister's shadow, how she became a doctor and has an amazing husband, and two perfect kids that don't even know they have an aunt. then there's me, I have mind powers, control things with my mind or read minds. I was always the freak of nature, even our parents didn't want me. I feel bad for him but he's the reason for my nightmares. Like now I'm lying in bed awake because I'm too afraid to go to sleep. I glance at the clock and groan to see its three in the morning. I get up and pad my way to the kitchen to get some warm tea before heading to the library. I jump as I turn the lights on and see Loki just sitting in the dark.
"hello mortal"
"hi" I say quickly before making my tea before heading to the library and continuing to read my current book 'The Hobbit'
I start to dose off when I hear knocking at the door. it opens to reveal Loki looking in. his eye brows furrow in confusion when he sees me.
"you've been in here all night" I place my book before looking away.
"yeah I have a hard time sleeping sometimes"
"why"
"Nightmares" he steps towards me and I back further into my chair. I look up at him with fear evident in my eyes. he stops
"your nightmares are of me" I look down at my hands but nod
"from what happened six months ago"
"yeah" I whisper.
"I see" I can hear the hurt in his voice. I know he's trying to change and trying to earn our trust. I look at the grandfather clock and see its 7:30
"well I think I'll go get some breakfast" I get up from my spot and place the book back in its place before walking past Loki. He grabs my wrist
"I know I have done some horrible things in the past but please accept my apologies for my mistakes" I take a shuttering breath before gently taking my hand away from him and exiting the library.
"you pathetic mortals are all the same. you value everyone's life" I struggle against his grip as he chokes me harder. The more I struggle, the tighter his grip gets.
"Name!!" I hear the others screaming my name. I can feel the tears falling down my face as my vision starts to blacken. Loki laughs
"They're calling your name" I look up to the sky as the pain is getting worse by the second. I start to close my eyes as the grip loosens and I feel nothing but air around me. I pray that the impact of the concrete ground won't hurt as badly as I am right now. I just close my eyes and just wait for it all to end.
I shoot up in my bed, I'm breathing hard as I look around and realize I'm in bed and it was just another nightmare.
"Damn will this ever end" I grumble before getting up and do the same routine that I do every other time I have this nightmare. I make my tea and walk to the library. when I walk in I'm surprised to see Loki sitting in my chair and see he's reading my book. I shift my weight from foot to foot not knowing how to fully react to this. He must have heard me because he looked up
"what are you doing up? you need your rest." he takes notice of the slight sweat and dark circles under my eyes.
"um, I just came in here to read that book actually but since you are reading it go ahead. I can come back." I turn to leave but his voice stops me.
" Y/N wait" I turn around and watch him. he sets the book down and gets up. he walks slowly over to me and scoops me up in his arms. I'm frozen in place but I can't help but snuggle into his shoulder. He sits down with me in his lap. I slightly shift in place to get comfortable while he just watches me. I avoid all eye contact. I feel his hand under my chin as he lifts it up so I look into his eyes
"I promise you, I will never be the cause of your nightmares again" he leans in and brushes his lips against mine. we break away for air. I lay my head down on his shoulder and snuggle into his neck. Loki picks up the book and starts to read aloud to me.
"There once lived a hobbit...."
Soon after I'm passed out on his lap as he reads to me. He glances down at me and smiles before placing a soft kiss on my forehead. After months on constant nightmares I finally get a good night's sleep without any nightmares to ruin it.