My Hater, My Lover (Book One)

Chapter 12 - The tipping point (Eron)

I saw him again the cafeteria again, after the orientation, a week later.

I went to talk to him but I ended up bumping into him by accident in my rush to get near him. But I was so excited that I finally got a reason to talk to him.

"Oops, my bad," I laughed, excited to finally speak to him. 

 "Watch where you're going, loser," Tesha spat. I was taken aback. What?...

I suddenly became aware of my friends looking at him with contempt. They could tell he didn't belong here. They just saw a poor minority with worn out clothes and terrible skin. They didn't see what I saw in him.

They started to attack him verbally.

I felt helpless and horrified. I wanted to do something but I didn't. I thought of my home situation. My hateful father. My friends approval meant everything to me. I couldn't lose it. In my own selfish desire to protect myself, I let them attack him. I lost my own chance with him.

This wasn't how I had expected to go down, at all.

My friends started to bully him and I played along. It was painful and horrible. 

Because I was a coward.

 I would come home, and I would shut myself in my room. I would slide down against the wall of my bedroom and mentally hate myself.

 In my dreams, I would dream of him and I walking together through the school hallways holding hands. Sometimes he would kiss me first, other times, I would kiss him. He would smile at me, which was so rare for him in reality.

After about a year of the bullying the one I wanted to be with, my father almost killed my mother.

She was rushed to the hospital, and my grandparents found out about the abuse.

They demanded a divorce and my father gave it gladly. 

He wasn't going to be taken to court, because his side of the family was more powerful than my mother's.

I didn't care that he deserved to suffer. I was past that point in my life. I just wanted peace for my mother and I. I was just so glad that demon was out of my life. My mother lay in that hospital bed, smiling tears of joy through her swollen lids.

I went to school the following day, in a daze. 

I was getting my shoes on, when I realized that my friends had stolen Miguel's umbrella.

After the day before where I almost lost my mother, I had had enough. I snatched the umbrella from Bryan's hand and I ran in the rain, after Miguel.

"Miguel!" I called out. I could just see him in the distance.

I ran when I suddenly stopped in my tracks.

 I saw Miguel getting over the railing of the bridge.

My voice got stuck in my mouth. I felt helpless again. The same way I couldn't protect my mother, I felt paralyzed to stop Miguel.

Don't jump, my mind thought in a panic.

Then he climbed down and I breathed relief. I wanted to run over to him, beg for forgiveness, but somehow I felt unworthy...

I stood in the rain, never once opening Miguel's umbrella. I just let the cold rain drench me.

I watched him walk away into the distance, and I just stood there. Numb and empty inside.

That night, while I sat beside my mother's bedside in the hospital, I had nightmares of my friends standing around the bridge, pointing down into the waters, laughing.

I would run to the edge of the bridge and see in horror that Miguel had jumped.

"Miguel!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

I would up with a start. My head was sweating. I looked over at my mother. She was fast asleep, and my grandparents were asleep in chairs, the same as I.

I resolved that I would change my life.