Impossible

Ch. 19

Sorry for taking so long... x

JASONS POV:

*4 WEEKS LATER*

"Jason, c'mon, let's go!"

Jessica begged, pulling my arm towards the door.

"Jess, babe, I'm not feeling going out tonight, I'm tired from basketball."

She frowned, obviously upset about not getting what she wanted.

"Fine. Stay in and get fat. I'm going with Nalia."

She turns her nose up, heading out the door.

After it finally shuts, I sigh, sinking into the couch with my bowl of ice cream.

It's been 4 weeks since Jess and I started dating, we went to the bowling alley, and I got that stupid text from Mica.

I still see Mica at school, since she has a locker by me, but we hardly ever talk. The only time we even interact is when she drops a book and I retrieve it, a small "thanks" is the only gratitude I receive before she scrambles away. In no way is Mica outgoing, but she's not that shy.

Where has my life gone in the past 4 weeks?

I made the basketball team, I have a popular girlfriend, plus I have good grades.

Why do I feel like this then?

I feel like how I did when I was dating Jessica before; dull and pointless

All she does is empty my wallet and take care of my, um, needs.

She's pretty I guess, but she's no Mica.

Jessica is not as athletic, gorgeous, or as smart as Mica, and all those things I have high expectations for.

Why couldn't I just be with Mica?

How come I always date Jessica?

Why am I still dating Jessica?

I sigh, plopping a glob of the vanilla ice cream in my mouth.

I need to clear my head, but I'm afraid to go back to the gym after seeing Mica there.

There's another problem in my endless list, Why the hell am I so scared of being around Mica?

It's not like we broke up or anything, but it almost feels like we have.

If you break up with someone you've been with for so long, when they're not always there with you, you feel empty and all - around unsatisfied.

That's how I feel without Mica.

As my thoughts run rampant throughout my head, I turn on my TV, focusing of the episode of Castle that's on.

I lose track of time, starting to watch it at 5 and by 5:50 I'm on the edge of my seat, watching Castle and Beckett chase down the bomb. They're at an empty warehouse, looking quizzically at the warehouse, when they open a white van and holy shit the bomb's there.!.!

My ice cream is long gone while I watch as Castle and Beckett make a run for the door as gunshots are fired at them. Once they're inside, a lock is clicked, and shit they're trapped in a freezer now!

My eyes refuse to blink as I watch the final minute of the episode. Beckett is passed out from the cold, there's no reception, and Castle is on the verge of dying. The episode cuts, and I wait for the next part to come on.

My mood drops from sad to downright pissed off when I see that a stupid Heat game is on after that beautifully directed episode. I quickly flip the TV off, and run for my laptop, desperate to find the next part.