sugar daddy (misc)

puns

i bet you need some puns in your life right about now (-:

let's have a garden party,
lettuce turnip the beet

how did the farmer find his wife?
he tractor her down

whenever i get undress in the bathroom,
my shower gets turned on

why did the balloon go near the needle?
he wanted to be a pop star

what to say to a hitchhiker with just one leg?
hop in

jokes about pms are not funny.
period.

you're becoming a vegetarian?
i think that's a big missed steak

do you know how they make holy water?
they boil the hell out of it

aim for the stars!
but first take care of the bodyguards

somebody stole all my lamps.
i couldn't be more delighted

sad to say i actually laughed at some of these