Blink;BaeJinyoung

;열하나

november 9;early morning

i woke up in bed. the ceiling capturing my attention. all around me, the room was white and had limited furniture. i was lying down in a bed with just white sheets. on my body, was clothes that i wish  to  never find myself in ever. but here i was, laying in those clothes.

no one was able to be found so i came to the conclusion that i was by myself. i tried to get up from the bed but i couldn't. it felt as if i had been tied down with something strong. i attempted once again to break free from whatever was holding me down but i couldn't. tears threatened to fall from my eyes at my unsuccessful attempts. i couldn't yell for help;my voice wouldn't come out of my throat. at that point, i felt so useless.

i gave up on wanting to escape this room. i let myself lay on the bed. i faced the ceiling again, tears already dispersing themselves on my face . as if everything was just a dream, it faded black.

my eyes opened, finding myself in the room i've stayed in my whole life. my laptop sat on my bed where i last placed it, just like the rest of my belongings. looking out of my window, the sun has not risen yet and it was still early in the morning.

my alarm read 5:29 am. i lifted my hand to my forehead, feeling sweat. or was it tears? i didn't know anymore. confused at the sudden turn of events, i walk over to Jisung's room, peeking in. he was asleep, as always. i needed to talk to him once again.

these dreams were so repetitive that i'm starting to become worrisome of myself. to me, it seemed as if these dreams had a significance, except i couldn't find what. i had no one to turn to or talk about my dreams with. i felt lonely at the moment.

i had slipped into a pair of jeans and a hoodie, preparing for another one of those lonely walks around my neighborhood. although it was only 5 in the morning, there was a bit of sunlight, not enough to fully light up the streets but i could manage.

my phone and keys were in my back pocket, including money just in case i got hungry. i made my way out the door, into the coldness fall brought. a cool breeze blew onto my face, sending shivers throughout my body. there were a few cars driving by every now and then as parents started their early mornings just like me, except i have nowhere in mind to go as always.

i turned towards the direction of school, where most of the shops and restaurants were located. some were closed, and others prepping for opening. i stepped into a cafe that had just opened and walked to the register. seats were empty (obviously, the cafe just opened) and i had chosen to take the seat located closest to the window. as i waited for my drink, i took out my phone and started to play games on it.

my drink later arrived and i thanked the waiter. i messaged jisung about my whereabouts just in case he was worried for me and i called jihoon to come to the cafe so i could talk about my dreams. it was about time that i got this off my shoulder as it scared me and i didn't know what else to do.

anxiously waiting for him to arrive, i had constantly repeated what i wanted to say to him. starting from a few weeks ago to now. all these things that have been happening, i needed to tell him. at that moment, jihoon walked through the door. i waved to him, motioning him to sit across of me.

"so what's up?"
"uhm"

my mind had blanked out on me and i didn't know what to say anymore.

"jiyoon?"
"oh uh, well i... i've been getting these weird dreams that always show a guy and a girl but i can never hear their conversation and then the boy just walks off and then i wake up."
"well then, i don't know how-"
"the scary thing is that i saw this figure 2 weeks ago and she looked familiar. like she had some sort of relationship with me. but i don't know..."
"jiyoon."
"yes?"
"describe her."
"she has long, straight brown hair. i guess she is sort of tall and her eyes make her look innocent."

as i described the girl to jihoon, it looked like he knew someone that looked like her.

"the girl you're talking about, i..i think i shouldn't be the one to discuss with you about this. i think you should ask your cousin."
"can you at least tell me about my dreams?"
"my best bet is that you could go to the doctor about that. i'm sorry i can't help you with this."

i felt disappointed and upset that he could possibly be hiding something important from me but i brushed it off. if he didn't want to tell me, i'll find out myself. it was almost 6 so i decided to head back home, along with jihoon.

"why won't you tell me about this girl?"
"look, you'll figure it out yourself once you know who to ask and where to go."
"but i don't know who to go to."
"think again jiyoon. you're smart enough."