Be My Juliet [on hold]

Chapter 34

*Jess’s POV*

Don’t do it.  I pick up my phone, my finger hovering over it ready to press ‘call back’.  Don’t you dare.  It’s not going to change anything.  My hand disobeys my brain for a split second and taps the screen and starts calling the journalist that I had called to start this lie.  I sit through two rings before someone picks up.  “Angeline Ross, celeb writer for Metro Newspaper.  What’s your story?” a perk voice yaps into the phone.  Hang up right now.

“Hi Angeline…” I hear my voice sneak out of my mouth so quietly I doubt the receiver even picked up the sound vibrations.  “I’m Jessica Lewis… we talked earlier, didn’t we?”

“Oh, yes we did Ms. Lewis!  Thanks again for that tip; that’s the biggest story of the week in Hollywood!”  I can almost hear her overconfident smile through her words.

“I’m sure that’ll change soon; there’s always some scandal…”

“Very true…” she laughs.  “So tell me, why did you call again?  Another juicy detail of the romance you’d like to indulge?”

Hang up.  The angry and bitter part of my brain yells.  Hang up now.  She deserves to suffer.  Think back about it all.  No, I try to fight back.  Pen doesn’t deserve any of the shit I’ve put her through.  I’m the monster, not her.  I’m the one who tore my best friend’s life to shreds.

“Still there?” I hear Angeline ask, zapping me back to reality and halting my train of thought.

“Yes.” I say too quickly.  “I’m here.”

“Well?” she urges me on, egging me on to tell her every single aspect of the fake relationship I forged.

“Actually, yes.”  Don’t do it.  “I’ve actually heard that Penelope and James will be going out on a date tonight, and I thought you might want a few more pictures of the couple.”

“Oh of course!  We definitely want more!  Where will they be?”

“Los Pollos Hermanos in Leicester Square.  7:00pm.”  I frown at myself for even thinking of this idea as she thanks me and hangs up.  Now I’ve actually got to go through with it. 

My harebrained mind came up with a way to make Pen forgive me after thinking about it for hours.  Granted, I’ll lose James, but by this point I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.  It is.  Admit it, you like being with him, even if it’s for all the wrong reasons.  You crave him.

Again I find my finger floating about the call key, poised to phone James and finalize my plan.  Without thinking I let my finger drift down, and bring the phone to my ear, and wait for him to answer.

“What do you want, babe?” he asks right from the start.  The mix of rudeness and lust that I used to love so much suddenly repulses me, and makes me question what exactly I’ve gotten myself into with him.

“I want you to take me out.  Tonight.” I reply in the sassiest voice I can muster.

“Someone’s pushy.”

“Listen here Buckner:  I want to go to dinner.”

“Will you make it worth my while?”

“Most definitely.”  I tell him, knowing exactly what he’s expecting of me.  “We are going to Los Pollos Hermanos at 7:00pm.  Leicester Square.”

“Fine.  Wear that skirt I like.”  With that, he hangs up.  Not a goodbye, not a ‘see you later, love,’ no nothing.

I check the clock to see how much time I have to get ready, and am surprised to see that it’s only 4:00.  I decide to pamper myself, seeing as there will be tons of pictures taken of me later and I don’t want to look like a mess.  I start with a bath and a facial, letting myself soak and relax for a while as I listen to Love by Daughter, the calmest music I have.  I let my eyes slip shut as I focus on the song itself, listening and dissecting the lyrics one by one and relating them to myself.  Soon I start belting it out, letting my horrid singing voice echo through the empty halls of my flat.

“And take your hand off him ‘cause he’s the only one that I have ever loved…” My mind races with thoughts of James, surprisingly; as I imagine him with the countless number of girls he’s been with.  “And please don’t find her skin,” I continue, my eyes starting to sting with tears over a guy I was ready to lose just five minutes before.  Where is all this emotion coming from?  This back and forth between want and disgust for James is upsetting my stomach, as if I’m on a ship caught in a storm of passion-fueled thoughts.  I sing along with the final words in that verse: “When you turn the lights out,” as I think more on what exactly I’m feeling.  Am I in love with this asshole?  Do I care if he’s with someone else?  I hope for my sake the answer is no.

I hop out of the tub after realizing I had spent a few hours in there thinking about him.  I dry myself off quickly and put my hair up into an effortlessly pretty half-up-half-down look and curling the ends.  I do my makeup just how I always do for dates: a dark purple smoky eye to make my green eyes stand out even more than they already do.  I put on Death Valley by Fall Out Boy as I start pulling out different options for what I’m going to wear, swaying my hips like an idiot and stomping and clapping to the beat.  Eventually I throw on the skirt James was talking about: simple, mint green, and short enough to show off my long legs very well.  I decide to let it take the center stage, so I pair it with a black lacy tank top and a jean jacket to keep warm.

Sooner than I thought, the clock strikes 6:30 and I decide to head off for the restaurant after texting James and planning to just meet there.  I throw my phone, keys, and other necessities into a basic black bag and head off, thinking over this plan again and again until I don’t even know that I think is right anymore.  You know you don’t want to do this, I tell myself.  Admit it.  You want Pen to suffer because you know it’s the only way James will be yours and only yours.  He needs to take Pen away from Dan for him to realize that it’s you he wants.  I try to drown out the fighting voices in my head with music, but it doesn’t work.  The bickering continues as I get off the train, and as I walk to the restaurant, and as I wait outside for James.

I survey the area, and spot Angeline hiding off to the side, a predator waiting for her prey to fall into her trap.  I see James waiting towards me from about a block away, and I pull out my phone.

I hope this helps, Pen.  I’m sorry. – Jess

I send it to her without thinking, then look up and see James smirking at me.  “You look great babe,” he says, twirling his finger and silently telling me to spin for him.  I do, letting my hair fan out and skirt parachute as air flows under it.  I stop and find him closer to me, his arms outstretched towards me.  I smile and blush a little and almost instinctively reach out to him, hugging him tightly.  He’s never like this.  Never.  He’s being affectionate and kind, a huge yet very welcome difference.  “Is it bad that I missed you?” he smiles shyly at me as he whispers in my ear.  He kisses my lips sweetly as he pulls away from me, and that’s when I hear the camera click.

Hey guys! I’d like to start this by sincerely apologizing for disappearing for a while.  My life got extremely hectic and not that great, so I had to deal with everything.  I’m hoping I’m back now though! I’d also like to thank @redeyedtreefrog for the AMAZING fan art!! If you’d like to make fan art for this story, PLEASE do and send it to me! I’d absolutely love to see it and I’d dedicate any chapter you like to you.  Also, here’s a list of songs you all must look up: Wisconsin by Bon Iver, Silver by the Neighbourhood, The Honeymoon Stage by Carlie de Boer, Mini World by Indila, Sleep Walk by Santo & Johnny, Introduced Species by Hands Like Houses, Shapeshifters by Hands Like Houses, Wisteria by Hands Like Houses, Once Upon A Dream by Lana Del Rey, and Love by Daughter.  If you want, tell me which of these is your favorite in the comments!  Speaking of the comments, let’s play a game, shall we? I’m very curious as to how you guys see all of these characters, meaning what they look like to you.  So if you’d like, tell me which actor/actress would play each character and I’ll tell you if I see them the same way!  Another question: do you guys have any ideas for new titles I could use? I don’t really like the one it is now, but I can’t think of another.  If you have an idea, please tell me, and if you read through the comments and see one you like tell me so! As always, please comment and vote if you liked this chapter, and follow me if you’d like to know when the next update is! (I pinky promise it won’t take seven months this time…) Stay amazing xx