Speak Now

Chapter 11: A clown visits me

"If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint,' then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced."
-Vincent Van Gogh 
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I perch on the sofa, my arms draped over the cushions as I watch the movie on TV.  It's a chick flick. I don't usually watch this genre but there's nothing else on and so I lie lazily licking my salt coated fingers from the popcorn filled bowl in my lap.

My phone beeps with notifications every half an hour or so, and my fingers itch to grab it and see who's messaged me.
And that is precisely why I don't give in to temptation.

I have grown too dependent on my newfound friends. The nightmare has reminded me of this, and I need to switch my attitude to one of indifference.

Exasperated, I grab the remote to flick the channel when I hear the doorbell ring. Startled, I launch myself out of my niche and hop down the hallway.

I'm expecting the mailman but when I open the door, I see a clown.

My mouth gapes open as the clown grins. The red paint around his lips looks startlingly creepy, and I shift nervously on my feet. I realise I'm still in my pajamas and blush.

This is preposterous, I think, The silliest dream ever.

"Hey," The clown's voice is familiar and I frown, trying to place it. Meanwhile the clown reaches over to pull off his rainbow coloured hair, and I gasp, as a mop of blonde hair comes into view.

"Didn't recognise me?" Adrian smiles. His blue eyes twinkle, and I manage a tight smile. I'm still wondering why Adrain has shown up at my house as a clown, when he nods at the open door,"May I come in?"

"Uh sure."

I step aside and allow him to enter. He passes me, and I smell something sweet and sugary. Candy.

"Were you at a birthday party?" I laugh. Adrain removes his shoes, his back to me, as I glance at his outfit. A white jumper dotted with smiley faces.

"Yes, unfortunately." He sighs,"The children were MONSTERS. They ate my hat."

I giggle,"Ate your hat?"

He points at me, grinning,"It wasn't a pleasant sight. They liked my hat so they stole it."

We both laugh, and I study him again. To my surprise, he zips open the jumper and steps out, groaning in the process. I'm too startled to properly be embarrassed as I see the tshirt he was wearing inside the jumper cling to his skin with sweat.

"So..."

I wonder if leading him to my room would be too inappropriate. Then I decide to take him to the TV lounge and then offer him a drink.

"So what?" He asks, as he folds the jumper and thrusts it aside. He wears shorts, and I look away from his legs, smooth and shiny with sweat.

Why do boys look so hot when they sweat?

"How'd you find a job this quick?"

"The hired clown caught hay fever so I volunteered to step in. It was a coincidence the kid's house was near yours...because I'd hate you to think I'm stalking you."

He shoots me a sly smile, and I grin back,"Oh I didn't think that." I pause. We're both huddled in the foyer, a few feet of space between us and....

I wrinkle my nose,"Ew you smell gross."

Adrian laughs,"Can I trouble you?" He looks at me nervously,"Can I take a shower here?  I mean.."

Blushing, I nod. Too vigorously. I chide myself for my rapid thoughts.

Thoughts can be dangerous. Especially the thoughts of a girl in the presence of a cute boy. Alone.

So I try to shut mind which pictures  me and Adrian alone in my room, me pushing him onto my bed, lips grazing his tanned neck....

Shut up, I scold myself

"Yeah." I say,"Follow me."

In the end, Adrian and I end up in my bedroom despite the inappropriate notion of it.

For a minute, he stands there, studying my room. I realise how different he is from Tristan. Tristan watched my room like he was studying a secret, and Adrain studies my room like he's watching me. Me unmasked. Me unclothed. With my secrets laid out like a feast.

Then he breaks his stare and hurries over to the bathroom, his expression indifferent.

Before he closes the door, he shoots me a warm smile. Heat rushes to my cheeks and I manage a wavering smile.

Heart beating fast, I head down the stairs to prepare a drink for my friend, the clown.

As I rush over to the kitchen, I allow a series of giggles to escape my lips.

Then I hug my stomach. The butterflies are flying around, kicking me and embracing me simultaneously.

I never knew having a slight crush on someone could be so exhilarating and painful at the same time.

Sighing, I open the fridge and see what feast I could prepare for the clown in my bathroom.

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