Fanfiction Cliches (and Where to Find Them)

Cliche #7 - Who Needs Parents?

Cliche: Parents in fanfiction are usually absent or just really damn clueless.

Example:
"Hey, Muuuum," I called from my bedroom. "Do you mind if I go backpacking across Europe with this super famous man who is twice my age and I literally just met five minutes ago?"

"Don't forget your toothbrush, darling!" Mum called back.

Why it's a cliche:
REAL PARENTS WOULDN'T DO THIS. I'm 17 years old and I'm not allowed to walk up the road without permission - and I have to bring my sister along as well (because safety in numbers).

If I told my mum that I was going off on a wacky roadtrip with a bunch of guys I'd only just met, I would be grounded until I turn 30.

In My Own Words:
Parents are absolutely unrealistic in my fanfictions. Some of them just let their kids do whatever the bloody hell they want. Here's some examples.

* * * *

I glared at him. "What right do you have to tell me what to do?"

"Georgia!" Mum said, shocked. "Don't talk to George like that!"

"I'll talk to him how I like!"

"You will do as you're told and show your father some respect!"

"He's not my father!" I said, raising my voice to a scream. "He's not my father and he never will be! I don't want him to be! I never wanted a dad, and I certainly don't want him!"

"Georgia Alice Edwards, you stop this nonsense right now!" Mum shouted, grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me. "George is your father and you will apologize to him this minute!"

Sure, Michelle does try to discipline Georgia in this scene from A Bit More of You, but if this was realistic, most of us wouldn't escape with a mere telling off. If I spoke to my parents like this in front of guests, I know I'd suffer severely as soon as the guests left.

* * * *

Serenity soon took a deep breath, let a few tears dribble down her bright pink face, and charged out of the room.

"Reeny!" George cried, rushing to the door. "Come back! Reeny!"

Serenity didn't stop running. She didn't even look back. The last thing George heard was his daughter screaming, "DON'T CALL ME REENY!", the sound of the front door slamming, and then...

Silence.

If I ran away like that after shouting at my mum or dad, I'd probably be dragged right back inside before I could make it out the front door.

* * * *

"Mrs Lawson?" David said in his usual charming voice. "May I ask the privilege of taking Anne out for a treat tea? Just so we can talk things over and make up properly."

I shot Mum a pleading look. She barely even noticed. Maybe she was too worried about raising a potential serial killer to think her decision through carefully.

"I think that would be a good idea," Mum said. "Where will you be going?"

"To the park. I'll buy her a special ice cream from this lovely little stand they have there," David replied, grinning.

"Mum, you can't -" I began.

"Don't cause such a fuss, Anne," Mum said irritable. Then she caught onto my agonized expression. "Well, I suppose you can go... only if Scarlet goes with you."

Now Anne's parents from My Thin White Duke deserve some kind of medal for neglectful parenting because they do it so bloody often. They just LET their 16 and 14 year old daughters go out with an obviously creepy and suspicious older man??

And what's worse is that Anne's parents are heavily based on my own... yet I made them the most oblivious parents in the known universe?