My possesive ex-boyfriend.

chapter twenty seven - don't talk to me.

kirstys pov,

Elisha, sat there trying to reassure me, she was a great friend and i wish i spent more time with her to realise it..

then he door bell went.

"that must be sam. Kirsty wait here whilst i go and let her in."

i actually like sam now, im glad she ruined mine and Jakes relationship, because otherwise i could still be with him, pretending to have a life with him, what i wouldn't of actually had.

she was a decent friend, i just don't like that she sleeps about, well she isn't that bad actually she's only been with about 15 guys.. it could be much worse, but i'd just like to see her settle down, and have a nice comfortable relationship.

 then sam came rushing into elishas bedroom.

"OMG i am so sorry kirsty, i should've been there for you.. you should've been staying at mine and not chloes, im sorry, really sorry! elisha told me everything. even though when i slept with Aiden he was really good-"

i glared at her.

"sorry, but i just didn't think of him as the 'dean' type, but this is kinda strange kirsty, what is it with guys getting clinged on to you?"

she's asking me that?

if i knew, i would change whatever it is about myself.

i hate it.

i hate this.

i hate the fact that he won.

i hate the fact that he got what he wanted.

i hate  the fact that i knew he wanted more.

i guess i just hate the fact that i hooked up with him in the first place.

if i didn't do that, then none of this would've happened.

its my fault.

all of it.

I sighed.

even sams been with this guy.

"kirsty are ok?"

"im fine."

fine? i've havent been this bad in ages.

i just want it all to stop, all of it.

i hate every single thing about myself;

i hate my life.

i hate how ugly i am.

i hate how fat i am.

i guess i really just hate feeling like this.

depressed girl.

who self harms.

who's ever going to want me?

who's ever going to want to touch me again?

this is the second time i've been raped, and im not having a third time.

I'll do what i have to, in order to protect myself, i don't care about anything or anyone anymore.

my life is one big,fat screw up, and i need to change for once and for all.

****

"sam are you staying?" elisha asked her

"mm i dont know, you see my cute 'fling friend' wants to meet me."

fling friend? pha.

"come on, do it just this  once sam! your always with boys. You even said yourself friendships are more important than any friendship."