Reaching Forward | Madoka Magica

01 - A Burning Desire

"Akira, don't drop the syrup," mother scolds, struggling to maintain a stern composure while cradling a persistent, wailing baby Daisuke. "Goodness, Daisuke, please calm down!"

Flustered, I set down the food item and regret being so clumsy. I know that girls my age are more accident-prone, but it really is embarrassing to be called out. I slowly begin to consume my breakfast as I scan the kitchen with my eyes, meeting the scene of my five other family members each trying to fulfill each other's needs.

Mother has finally calmed Daisuke down, but was immediately occupied and immersed seconds after with Hotaru's hair. Father was attempting to assist 8 year old Rin with his homework, but it was to no avail. Rin was already throwing pencils. And, as soon as we think the bawling had finally stopped, Daisuke starts the water works all over again.

I've always been aware of the fact that none of my siblings look as I do. They each had brown hair with green eyes - no trace of my signature pink features I was born with. On family outings, I always stuck out like a sore thumb.

That was what brought me back to my insecurity of not belonging. Yes, I know that my family loves me, and yes, I love the life I live. However... it's my burning desire to understand. To know things. To see why. And... most of all... to know where I truly belong.

"Akira, you're going to miss the bus." Father's deep voice snaps me from whatever dream world I was living in, and back into reality. "R-right," I stutter, still a bit dazed at how fast time can pass when you're deep in thought. "Goodbye, everyone. I'll see you after school!"

"Bye, Akira," each of them wave. "Love you."

I snatch my book bag off of the table in the front room and throw it over my shoulder, and walk outside into a bright morning. The sun felt warm on my face, and the air smelt of sweet petals. The cherry blossoms were in bloom, and it always reminded me of Spring Break. (Which was just around the corner).

Walking to the bus stop each morning was a part of my daily routine. As I walk, I assess my neat, starched school uniform. It was clean, as mother washed it just last night, and consisted of a yellow sweater-shirt, a white undershirt, and a green skirt. It was completed with nice, brown dress shoes and a simple red bow tie. I braided my long, bubblegum colored hair and each pigtail hung at my side.

I looked presentable - just like everyone else.

When I finally arrived at the bus stop, there were no signs of the banana-colored child transporter. Usually I came right on time, but perhaps the driver was running late. It was no matter, though. I can simply wait for the bus on the wooden bench behind me.

No words or sounds were uttered except for a small, subdued sigh of mine. Not even the birds were conversing today - which held its own benefits. It was, cliche as it is, quiet enough to hear a pin drop. Until-

"Greetings."

Startled, I jump with a start and turn to see a not a human - but some sort of creature. It didn't seem to be an ordinary animal that you could catch roaming the streets. The creature was as white and fluffy as a cotton ball, with these mesmerizing magenta eyes and a permanent smirk on its small face. Two cat-like ears stuck up on its head, though it also had ears resembling a rabbit protruding too. Two golden rings haloed its floppy ears. It was as if I were watching a sci-fi sitcom.

The only thing I could manage to say was, "What?"

"I said, greetings," the foreign creature repeats in a most matter-of-fact tone. "Humans do not seem to understand the concept of things the first time, do they?"

I don't answer. Instead, I take the time to gawk at this... thing. It could speak. I wasn't sure what it was; my most realistic guess is a hybrid chimera. Either way, it was talking to me. Talking to me.

"I am here because you have a wish to be granted," it continues, "Am I incorrect? Do you not have any desires? Anything you wish you had, but don't?"

I open my mouth, but quickly close it. What was I getting myself into? Was this some trick? Some glorified toy? Kids in my grade were rude that way. Maybe it was Souske, the class bully. He'd get a kick out of my reactions for sure.

"Where's your 'off button?'"I blurt, then stop myself. I am talking to a toy.

"Excuse me!' the toy protests, offended. "I am not a toy. In fact, I am an extra-terrestrial being who can grant the wishes of young girls in exchange for... Well, I suppose I should not speak to a non-believer."

"I'm sorry," I apologize, beginning to wonder if this 'Kyubey' could really do as it said. "But... did you say, grant wishes?"

"Correct," Kyubey gloats. "And I will indeed grant yours, in exchange for your... services."

"Services?" I inquire, becoming more and more intrigued, yet disturbed, by the second. "What do you mean by, 'services?'"

"If your wish is granted," Kyubey explains persuasively. "Then all I will need is you're undying will go fight against monsters we refer to as 'witches.' I will need you to become, a Magical Girl."

"A Magical Girl...?" I trail off as my interest began to fade. Maybe this really was a trick. A sick trick, feeding off the need for me to know things. A feeling of betrayal begins to surface.

"A girl who fights Witches," Kyubey explains further, casually and effortlessly confusing me. "That is all I need. You will be fighting for that one, single wish. Sound like a deal?"

I sit there, staring at the ground. Is he fooling me? Is this really what I feared it would be? Maybe I was being led on by my own, hopeless dreams.

The dream that I could know where I truly belonged.

"H-how do I know you aren't tricking me?" I ask quietly, voice full of uncertain hopes. Sad, really, that I could believe that this toy could grant my wish.

"Only one way to find out, Akira Mogami."

It knows my name!? What the heck?! I never gave it any information! But then again, would I normally give info to a toy?

Even so... It would be nice, knowing where I stand in life. Knowing what I'm doing, and who I'm supposed to be. It would be truly wonderful.

I could know why I don't look like the rest of my family.

I could know why I keep having strange dreams.

I could know everything I wanted to. So... that is what leads me on to actually trust this toy, or creature, or whatever it was.

"Fine," I agree, suddenly making up my mind. "I want you to grant my wish."

"And that would be?" Kyubey may not show any emotion whatsoever, but I could almost hear that snide little smirk of his.

"I wish to know where I truly stand."

"Are you sure?" Kuybey asks, taking on a sing-song tone of voice.

"Just do it," I interrupt, not wanting him to make me have any regrets.

Kyubey nods, then faces me. Large tail flicking this way, and that. I look into his magenta-colored eyes, and try not to change my mind. Every cell in my body begs me not to.

Slowly, I begin to feel this pulling sensation. I feel like I'm going to fall backwards, and that I am no longer sitting at the bus stop. Waiting for a late bus.

Something bright, and a deep color of pink, glimmers before my eyes. It looked a lot like a rock. I begin to fall back, but hold my hands around the stone.

A bright light flashes, and I end up laying on the bench. A dark pink stone, encrusted with elegant golden decoration falls onto my chest.

Then, my head begins to explode with searing pain.