Grayson Smith | ✔️

Chapter Thirty One. Mourning Doves.

Edited.

Song for this chapter: Mikky Ekko-Mourning Doves.(I actually love this song idk why but I just do, plus the song title suits this chapter so viola)

I had heard once that grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith but simply the price you have to pay for loving someone. No matter the type of love, friendly, romantic or family. It will always cost the same.

I use to think death was selfish and I still can't comprehend to this day why people leave the earth so soon, so unexpected, so painfully. I guess the white light you're supposed to see is too enticing to just leave behind.

I was thankful my dad and Angie got to experience having a family of their own before they left this earth. They both lived their lives with bright smiles on their faces, love in their hearts and a clear head. 

They were happy and that's all I could have wanted for them.

I just wish we had them a bit longer.

In church, Grayson tried to keep his composure and tears hid away in front of Angie's beloved friends and family but I knew behind his mask he was breaking down. We had sat at front at first besides Rachel who kept her words and saved us a seat but we soon moved to the back at Grayson's request. 

He buried his face into my neck.

I ran my fingers through his hair, soothingly.

And he cried.

People passing by to get to the top to say their goodbyes or leaving early because the pain of grief and loss was too hard to bare, dipped their heads low at the sight of Grayson who now didn't care who was watching him. They gave me sympathetic smiles, their eyes saddened and dull, like all the love and life was sucked and drained from them.

His face was red and puffy by the time the three of us reached the cemetery. My mind hadn't wondered to anything like who Rachel was to Grayson but stuck on Grayson's well being.

I hadn't only ever seen one in person before but on the grave beside where Angie was getting lay to rest, there was a beautiful white dove standing peacefully. Just taking in its surroundings around itself, I smiled at it and once it was happy with taking in its surroundings it flew off with it's angelic wings.

I knew then Angie was happy, looking down on all of us with a smile on her sweet face.

Thinking back to Rachel was wasn't in my top list of priorities right now, she seemed like a pleasant girl and I need to overcome my anxiety and to do that I need to not jump to conclusions so quickly until Grayson tells me himself who she is to him. 

I can tell in a click of a finger when he's lying or not, it's quite easy to tell. His emerald eyes give it away every time, they flick down to my lips first after a lie escapes his lips but if he's telling the truth they will be held in place with mine.

I was a bit scared Grayson was going to yell out for the people who were carefully placing Angie's coffin in the ground to stop. He held his breath the whole time, clasping onto my hand tightly but I didn't mind. It was a involuntary action he did, but he looked down at me with a guilty expression on his face uttering out a million 'sorry's'. 

I had assured him plenty of times it was okay and that I was alright and he didn't have to panic and apologise but the look of regret never once left his piercing eyes. 

It had been six hours. Six long hours of nothing but quietness, only the sounds of cars driving past and wind blowing in the trees around us.

He had offered to drive me home a countless amount of times but I had told him I wanted to stay with him. I would have taken up his offer if I knew he needed to be alone to vent but I could tell he needed someone, he needed me.