Depressive Quotes and Sayings

Art

In the picture you can see my recent Arts project. It was during a lesson when I suddenly looked around realized that my work has nothing to do with reality.
The body shape I was forming was just an idealized picture from society.
The girls should have formed breasts, have kurves but be skinny at the same time. And all boys should have a lot of muscles and a six pack.
Nearly nobody of the students in this room look like this.
Why are we forming the torso like this then?
I thought back at the beginning of this project. Our teacher showed us pictures of sculptures and some of the torsos from the last years. They were all formed like those idols.
It's not a surprise that girls starve themselves to death when they teach us even at school to be perfect, isn't it?
So I started to think about those girls and about my own body in comparison to what figure was lying in front of me.
No, when I am naked I don't look like this.
I am not perfect, I have scars and I am not even skinny.
And I don't want to start thinking about what my classmates are hiding under their clothes.
It does not even have to be scars or bones but can be birthmarks or hairs. Nobody is that perfect!
Next step I thought about how much power clothes actually have. I mean they don't hide only our shame but all those imperfections making us human. And because nobody shows them, because nobody dares to be not perfect we all form that perfectioned idol of our body's.
We only see what others want us to see of them. And at the same time we only show what others expect us to look like.
But is this who we really are? What we want to be?
Why can't society start to form realistic beauty ideals?
We would start feeling more comfortable in our skin. We would stop wanting to be all the same and start to be proud of what separates us from the mass.
We would top hiding behind our clothes.
So I started to form a second body at home. Art is there to be understood. It has a message.
So I formed my own message within this torso.
1. Realize how much people can hide behind your clothes if they don't want you to see it.
2. Start looking through the clothes and notice mentall illnesses.
3. Stop that image of a perfect body! Less people start to starve themselves in a mental illness when they don't feel the pressure of society.
4. Be proud of yourself. Of all of you. All your scars and all your imperfections!

But you know what?
Guess which figure I handed in in the end?
Right. The perfect one. Because this is what everybody expected me to be.
A student doing what she was told to and being afraid of the teacher noticing her little problem.
I got an A but I'm not proud of it. I mean, like I said art is there to be analysed. But if you look at the body I only see emptiness. It has no aura, has nothing to say. It is just clay.
It hasn't got a soul.
Isn't that sad? School teaches us to work as a machine. You start loosing your soul there.
And I don't know how much of my own soul is left behind.
At least a part of it is saved in the other skulpture lying in my shelve, hidden between socks so my parents don't see it.
One day I was looking for it an I saw, that a part of the right breast had broken off. But I wasn't sad. I just smiled and thought "Now it's perfect". It has become really like my soul. Splitted. Broken.

Sorry for gramma guys I'm actually German.