I Can Love You More Than This (One Direction Fan Fiction)

Chapter 20

HARRY'S POV

We were in Kate's living room. I was sitting across from her. She looked beautiful. Just as always. I missed her so much. When she left, I felt empty inside. I didn't even get the chance to explain to her. What happened with Caroline was a mistake. A big one. I've regretted it for months. I realized that there's absolutely no one else I want more than Kate. She's all that I needed. It was really quiet. Neither of us said anything yet.

Kate still looked shocked. Well, I'd be pretty shocked too if someone I hadn't seen for months suddenly appeared on my front door. I wasn't planning on going here but it's like something took over me and led me to her house. I'm not even sure of she wants to see me.

"Kate?" I broke the silence but she didn't seem to hear me.

"Kate?" I made my voice a tad bit louder. This gets her attention. She looked at me with a confused expression on her face.

"Uh- sorry. What is it?" She stuttered. I could tell that she was nervous by the way she played with a strand of her hair. This was it. I've been waiting for this moment for months now. I can finally explain to her what really happened. But it didn't feel right. There was something else that I needed to talk to her about. Something even more important.

"I'm sorry about what happened to Kris. I should've been there with you but I couldn't. I wanted so badly to get on a plane and go here to London and tell you everything's gonna be okay. I know how much she meant to you." Regret filled my voice. I really did want to be with her when I found out that Kris was gone. When I lost Emma, I had the boys with me. They would comfort me and make everything better but Kate was alone. I should've been there with her.

I'd be lying if I said that I didn't try because I really did try. I tried but our manager wouldn't let me go. Kate looked taken aback by what I said.

"Thanks. I wanted you to be there too. I called you but someone else answered. Then I realized that you guys don't need me. Now that I think about it, you guys have been doing great since I left. I was only being a burden to you guys." She mumbled.

I stood up and went closer to her. I knelt on front of her so we were now facing each other. "Kate, you were never a burden. It felt weird without you especially for me. You're my bestfriend. It wasn't the same when you left. In fact, when you left, Niall cried for about two hours. Don't tell him that I told you." She laughed. It felt nice hearing her laugh again.

"I missed you guys too." She told me with a smile.

"By the way, when did you call me? I didn't know that you called."

"I called you on the day of Kris' funeral. I got really upset after my parents told me that they were gonna let me see a shrink. So, I called you but you weren't the one who answered. It was a girl. She told me that you weren't there." She said the last part in a really quiet voice. Her parents made her see a shrink? I've really missed a lot. She needed me but I wasn't even there when I called. I wanted to ask her about it but I could tell that it was something that she didn't like talking about.

"It was probably Rachel, our stylist, who answered my phone. We usually leave our phones in our dressing rooms when we have interviews for shows."

"Oh. Okay." She sighed. She looked relieved. But why would she be relieved? Maybe I'm just imagining it.

We were quiet again for a few more moments. "Uh- I should go then. The lads are probably wondering where I am." It's probably best that I leave before things get a lot awkward. We both stood up to say goodbye. I was about to open my arms and hug her but I thought against it. Should I do it? What if she doesn't want me to? It's our first time to see each other after months of being apart. Maybe hugging her would only make her uncomfortable.