Bottoms up [merrikat]

It's killing me

"Zack." I laugh stumbling out of school, Alex and Rian decided to stay to do more of the work, "I really fucking appreciate you."

"I know." He said as I wrapped my arm around his shoulders for support, "You say this every time you're drunk."

"I just want you to know." I trip over my own feet and Zack grabs me before I fall, "You are fucking great."

"So are you."

"Really though."

"Jack can I ask you something?" Zack asked.

"You just did."

"You know what I mean."

"Sure." I mumble draining the last of my water bottle, "Go ahead."

"Why do you drink?" Zack always looked sad whenever he spoke about my drinking and right now is no different, he knows it's killing me and he hates it.

I don't care it's destroying my life. It's better than facing the truth and losing Zack. Whatever happens I don't want to loose him. I can't loose him.

"To feel good." I somewhat lie, I may be drunk but I'm not drunk enough to bait myself out, "And help win stress and things."

"Theirs other ways to feel good Jack."

"I know." It always pains me to see Zack upset about my drinking because I know if I just stop he wouldn't be sad anymore, but I can't stop, "It's just this is the most fool proof way that isn't hard drugs."

"Alcohol is one of the worse things for you."

"Crack is worse."

"I guess."

"I promise you I will never do crack." I say and Zack giggles faintly.

"You better not." We turn the corner to Zack's road, usually I would go home get drunk alone and pass out but instead I decided to hang with Zack, I'm not sure that's a good idea, "You know you can talk to me about anything. I won't tell the others if you don't want me to."

"I know."

Authors note

I'm probably going hospital tonight because I got kicked in the head at neck deep Friday and I'm still getting headaches and feeling sick. My mum said I'm fine and theirs nothing they could do but it might be bad.

I'm in a lot of pain so you're getting a short chapter.

Hugs, kisses and peace ✌🏻️