Finding my Wings

~11

        In a way I never wanted to leave. But I didn’t belong here. Deciding when was the most difficult. I knew that when I left I would have go back to uncle. Tristan didn’t know where he lived so maybe he would just let me go. I knew the best part would be that I knew I could never hurt Tristan from that distance.

        But he made it so difficult. Keeping a secret from him was harder than I expected. I started wondering around the hallways by myself when my feet became restless on those days Tristan had his tutoring lesson. In reality we were both only 17, but I had left school after my parent’s death. Tristan had been trying to convince me to go for my GED. The thought was too whimsical a task for me.

        I felt like I was being watched one day while walking around the East wing hallways. I’d lost track of time so maybe it was Tristan when he finished his tutoring. But I was proven wrong when at just the right moment I looked behind me and saw a little white face poking around the corner at me. Those little black eyes peered at me from the squashed face.

        “So it was you who was creeping on me huh?” I laughed quietly. “Somehow I don’t mind.” I bent down and held out my hand towards the kitten. The little faced bobbed closer hesitantly. After a little gentle coxing it butted its nose against my fingers. “See you’re harmless. But what’s this?”

        Around the little white kitten’s neck was a red ribbon tied in a bow, and a letter placed under it. The kitten didn’t protest when I scooped it up in one hand. Inside the letter was Tristan’s handwriting, addressed to me.

                To Keira,

                                I hope this little guy finds you. If he does won’t you honor me with your smile by joining me in the garden?

                                                Sincerely, T

        “He’s never done this before.” The kitten agreed by licking my face once and went back to relaxing on my arm. “So? Shall we?”

        It was a beautiful day outside. The sunn wasn’t too harsh and the air wasn’t too cold. The kitten was fascinated by everything and almost squirmed out of my arms when I made my way to the roses.

        “He seems to like you I see.”

        Tristan was standing inside the small gate, a single red rose gripped between his two fingers. I smiled and said, “He’s absolutely adorable. He’s my little stalker.”

        Tristan laughed loudly, “Your going to have to tell me that one, but first, Happy Birthday!”

        From behind his back he held out a rectangular box a little bigger than the size of my palm. “But it’s not my birthday.” Unless somehow it was already September.

        “Well I didn’t know when it was so I decided I would just get you something spur of the moment. “

        “You shouldn’t have spent money on me like that.” But my traitorous hand had already closed around the little intriquing box.

        “I didn’t actually. This belonged to my mother and she thought it would look better on you. She said she wasn’t a young beautiful woman anymore worthy of it.”

        I wasn’t worthy of it either, but with my free hand I flipped open the lid. Inside was a delicate gold chain that held a single red stone set like a raindrop on the pendant.  Tristan held it up and moved to put it around my neck.

        “Oh my god, Tristan it’s beautiful! But I don’t deserve it, it’s too much.”

        “Sometimes you have to let others spoil you, you know. And you do deserve it. Mother was given this by father after she’d started her chemo. He said it was to give her strength.” He fastened the clasp and turned around to inspect the treasure now around my neck. “I had hoped it would you strength. Oh! And this little guy is for you too.”

        “Oh wow! But he’s so precious and adorable!” in response the kitten nuzzled my face and purred.

        “You are too.”

         There was something in his voice that made me look up. His face was closer then I’d originally thought. His eyes held a hesitant worry but his breath was ragged a bit. It was like gravity the way he leaned forward. I knew I should move. I knew better then to kiss this prince-like boy with my dirtied peasant lips. But I couldn’t resist the desire for him to place those gently lips over mine. They brushed mine like the soft caress of a rose petal. But it felt like he’d sent a hot rod into my chest the way my heart squeezed tightly.

        The kitten still in my arms, Tristan snaked a hand around my waist and pulled my body into his. The desire he was also feeling became clear in how to the gentleness in his lips was replaced by a burning hunger for me. It was the kittens protest that made him pull away. His eyes held unhidden lust and for the first time I realized just how different this lust was from that of those men on the street. His hand rose up to cup my chin gently. He treated me as if I were a delicate piece of glass.

        “I wasn’t sure how you would react when I did that. Keira, I’m so in love with you it’s gotten so hard to not do this. I wanted you to see me as me and not someone who was just after something. The only thing I truly want is your heart.”