Old Version Shatter Pieces

Chapter 42: Marks

Elinn

I sat there on the ground in the hall outside of Carter's room just staring at the floor. I knew that there were people around me, I could faintly hear them, but it was as if I was underwater. I felt peaceful and calm here in my cocoon of nothing, there was no pain and no fear.

"Why did she call me Master? What does that mean Carter? What is going on with my sister?" Xander sounded as though he was miles away. It was a strange sensation to hear and not really be where the sound was coming from.

"Shut up Xander, I'm trying to figure this all out. Elinn, can you hear me? Can you please look at me, honey?" Carter's voice seemed closer than Xanders did and it pulled at my heart. It made my heart want to start feeling again, but I didn't.

"Don't touch me! Don't talk to me! I made it all go away and you're trying to make it come back. I'm fine like this, can't you see I'm happy? Isn't that what you wanted? Master said he wanted us all to be happy, look I'm smiling, doesn't that mean I'm happy?" The words were mine and yet they weren't all at the same time. I looked Carter in the eyes, his searched mine trying to find anything any emotion in them, but there wasn't any.

"Elinn please, I need you to come back. I know it hurts and it scares you, but you can't do this. It isn't healthy to just shut down like this, it doesn't mean your happy. I thought we were happy before didn't you?" Carter asked me cupping my face in his hands. Sparks spread across my cheeks and I could feel my heart and soul trying to push those awful emotions back onto me. I pushed away from Carter and scrambled backward.

"No, you're trying to make it come back. It needs to stay locked away so that we can be happy. That's what Master said needed to happen. Don't touch me, you make those things want to come back, and I don't want them. They hurt me, you promised me you wouldn't let anything hurt me anymore!" I couldn't understand how Carter couldn't see that I was happy like this.

"Elinn, those things are what make you who you are. They make you real, they make you feel alive, so I'm sorry for what I'm about to do." Carter was on top of me in seconds with his lips pressed on mine. My mind could no longer fight what my heart and soul wanted to happen. Everything came flooding back in and tears dripped down my cheeks.

"Why does she keep calling me Master? Carter, what the heck is going on here?" Xander shouted causing me to whimper and curl into a ball.

"I'm sorry Master, I wasn't a good girl. Your girl is sorry, she will try harder to be what you want her to be. I'll try harder to remember, I'll try harder I promise. Just please, don't punish me, I didn't mean to I promise." My words came out through my sobs. Carter rushed to hold me in his arms. I couldn't move I was too afraid of what Master would do to me.

"Elinn, that isn't Master, it is your brother. He would never hurt you and he is going to leave now so you and I can talk." Carters words were calm and yet the authority in them was clear. I heard quiet mumbling followed by footsteps moving away from us.

Carter carefully picked up my still sobbing form and carried me into his bedroom. Set me carefully down on his bed and moved to get back up but I wrapped my arms around him. If he left I would be all alone and I didn't think I could handle that right now.

"Elinn, I need to go get my laptop and I promise I will be right back. You can count to ten and I'll be back before you get to one, deal?" Carter asked.

I thought about it for a moment, I could sit here for ten seconds, right? I nodded and Carter got to his feet and looked at me expectantly. Only I didn't know what he wanted me to do.

"I can't go until you say start silly, that way you can start counting," Carter said as a small smile light his face. I looked down at my hands as I blushed wildly.