What I Want

Chapter 35: Blood

"Ben, you crack me up!" Mal laughed as she set the table for dinner. A whole week had passed since Ben and Mal had that heart to heart conversation about taking down the walls. They felt so much closer and were soaking up every minute of joy they had now.

"Glad you think it's funny when I sleep talk about you."

"What can I say? It was so friggin hilarious! You just kept moaning my name! Oh, I need to grab forks!"

Mal then made her way over to the drawer with silverware in it and reached for a fork.

"Well, I find your laugh friggin hilarious!" Ben teased.

"Shut up!" Mal snapped as she pulled the silverware out of the drawer, but they didn't feel like forks. She brought the utensils in front of her and realized she grabbed knives. She stared at her reflection in one, studying it carefully. Her mind began flashing back to her time with her mother. Her hands began to shake, making her drop one knife. Her knees buckled as she started to feel like she couldn't breathe. She began to feel dizzy, already sweating.

"Mal?" Ben said worriedly. Suddenly, Mal's eyes changed. Not only were they glowing, but they showed absolute fear and terror. She was about to have a flashback, and there was nothing Ben could do about it.

"Mom, no!" Mal begged,"no! I can't mom! It hurts! I can't! I can't! Mom! No! Please no. Please don't stab me again! No! Mom please. Please."

Mal then stood straight up and lifted her left arm to a 90 degree angle, her palm facing up.

"Alright, alright! I'll do it. Please don't stab me again! I'll do it."

Slowly, Mal raised the knife in her hand and placed the blade just above the spot where her elbow bent and began to cut into her skin, crimson blood oozing out.

"See mom, I'm doing it!" Mal wailed, tears streaming down her face,"I'm doing it!"

She then lifted the knife and made another cut below the first one, then the other. Once Ben realized what she was doing, he charged for her and tried to yank the knife from her hand. No way was Ben going to allow Mal to hurt herself, especially not like this.

"Mal stop!" Ben pleaded, but she couldn't hear him. She was stuck in her flashback.

"Mom, I'm trying but the knife is stuck! I can't move it!"

It actually was stuck, but that was because Ben was trying to keep her from cutting herself anymore, but instead it was digging more into her skin. He began to panic. He was making it worse, but what else could he do? With all his might and beastly strength, he tried to wrench the sharp bloody knife from Mal's fingers. He successfully made her let go, but not before he pulled back so hard that he cut his cheek, some blood dripping down his face.

"Ow," he gasped. Mal turned around to the sound, recognizing his voice instantly.

"Ben?" she whimpered, suddenly noticing his bleeding cheek. She reached up and tried to wipe the blood away, getting it on her fingers, but also noticing the blood dribbling down her left arm.

"What did I do?" Mal asked, horrified,"are you ok? What the hell happened?"

"It's just a scratch, Mal. I'm okay. I'm more worried about you."

"Well I'm more worried about you! Please, tell me what happened."

"What is the last thing you remember?"

"You were making me laugh about something and the next thing I know is that your cheek is bleeding, as well as my arm."

"You had another flashback," Ben sighed, knowing he couldn't keep it from Mal,"you were cutting yourself and begging your mom not to stab you. Is that something that really happened?"