TO MY OLD SELF
The Cid
The moment I opened
My eyes for the first time,
The moment I tried
To understand my existence,
The moment I started to smell
The fragrance of my home,
The moment I decided to live,
You decimated me!
To my old self,
You know how tender you are.
You're aware of how much you cared.
You've witnessed how they
Betrayed and used you,
But you didn't bother
To kick up a fuss.
You are such a dolt
For letting them regulate you.
You have seen too much
But you didn't intervene.
You portrayed a great pretender
That fooled everyone.
You showed up like you are
The strongest girl in the world,
Even when you're not,
Authentically.
You are synthetic.
To my old self,
You have been trying to
Avoid discrimination.
But it is the word itself,
Chasing you.
They were calling you
By names you don't deserve,
And seeing you so fine with that.
You are voiceless.
To my old self,
You deserve my deepest pity.
In any case,
You deserve my adulation.
You lived in hell for years,
Listening without
Explicating your sentiment.
You made it, Darling.
You were so weak,
Broken and depressed.
All the same,
You still survived.
You are the figure
Of a dauntless Louraine Jane.
Your courage to respect your fellows
Even when they're vile,
Is what made me who I am today.
To my old self,
Thank you.
