The Story I Never Published

six

Avoidance
part 2: the truths

~*~

Ian has always been the type of person to eliminate the awkwardness. He doesn't avoid girls that confess their feelings to him. In fact, he even thanks them for setting him as their idol because having a crush on someone is basically idolizing or admiring them. You can't say that those girls love him. Yes, they may say they do and accept him for who he is but that's just infatuation that they're feeling.

Love is knowing someone's flaws and accepting them fully. It doesn't matter if he cries because of movies or if he gets all sweaty and smelly after a long day at the gym, because you are in love with him. Those flaws won't matter to you if the love you are feeling is true.

And I hope hers is.

"I love the way she smiles and the way her hair gets messy whenever the wind blows them the opposite way," Ian describes, "and I love that she loves me as much as I love her."

This is not awkward for me. I swear.

We're here, sitting on the dewy grass, watching the glowing stars in the pitch black night sky. We talked about how I achieved my plan in avoiding Skye and how he, Ian, met his girlfriend, Devyn.

"I approached her and then we just started talking," he continued, "a few months after that party at Dawn's house, we started dating." Dawn is part of our squad. Yes, we still do have contact but he's probably busy with his law firm in Singapore that we couldn't find the time to keep up.

Ian also mentioned that after the college graduation, he immediately migrated here in America, that made him lose all contact to the entire batch—that includes Pandora and I.

"How 'bout your turn now, Quinn?" He turned his head towards me, "why were you crying that night?"

Oh no. Think quick, Huxley! He doesn't have to know—maybe in the proper time, but not now.

"I was just having some family problems back home," I muttered, trying to close the subject.

"Really?" I hesitantly nodded at him. "What happened to Aunt Lizzie? Did anything happen to them?"

"I just," I paused, "miss them."

"Why don't you visit them?" He asked, "I could come with you."

"No, no, that won't be necessary," I wiped a tear, "besides, Devyn needs you more than I do."

"Hey," he looked concerned as he was holding both of my arms. "Crying is for the weak, right?"

Yeah, because my weakness is right in front of me.

"Do you want to go home?" He asked, wiping my tears.

I nodded and we proceeded to walking back to where we parked our cars.

I didn't want to tell him any more of my nonsense drama—which is a complete lie. Nothing happened to my family back in the Philippines. I do miss them but they weren't the actual reason for my recent breakdowns.

I spoke too soon. He didn't have his car.

"Well, I got a little stressed out earlier so I just called an Uber," he scratched the back of his neck.

I chuckled, "we'll use my car but you're driving."

• • •

Ian pulled up in the designated parking space in front of my apartment. We were about to come inside when I heard my phone ring.

Pandora Jewelry 💎

I hit the green button immediately. She never calls me if she knows where I went so a hint of fear and nervousness approaches me.

"Panda?" I answered worridly, entering the house.

"If you're on the way ho—" she didn't finish what she had to say because she already saw me. She was standing by the kitchen mini bar, dumbfounded.

"Hey baby!" An irritating voice, which seems to be coming from an animal, greeted me.

"I don't think that I'm supposed to be here," Ian whispered.

I looked over to him and mouthed, "just go with the flow." Thankfully, he gave a quick nod, telling me that he agrees.

"I have pizza and chicken wings here," Pandora interrupted, wanting to break the tension.

"Babe, I've been waiting for you all day," Skye stood up from the couch and gave an attempt to hug me but Ian pushed him back.

"Easy there," Ian warned. He knew how much I disgusted this guy.

"Woah! Who the hell do you think you are to stop me from hugging my girl?" Skye shot back. This needs to stop. Pronto.

"Can you just stop, Skye?" I interject, "and just so it's clearer than before, I am never your girl. Once have but never will be again. Ever."

"Guys," I heard Pandora being concerned. I disregarded it for now. This 'misunderstanding' needs to be ironed out.

"Skye," I called out. I dragged him along with me outside to talk.

"Why are we outside?" He complained. Can't this man shut up and process all the information for once?

"Okay, I don't want this to come off as rude or anything but Skye, you need to understand that I don't love you in the way that you want me to," I explain, "this, this civilized friendship that we have is what you asked for. I agreed in reducing the awkwardness between the two of us because you wanted to keep our friendship. Not all ex-couples are strong enough to maintain as friends. That means that if you are strong and can take this situation that we have, you can be strong enough to let me go as well."

Skye looked mad, disappointed, and mostly pained all together but he didn't say anything—which made my heart beat a hundred times faster.

"You were the one to leave me, Skye," I recalled as tears traced down my cheeks, "you were the man I begged to stay but refused and did the opposite. Do you remember what happened six years ago? You broke up with me because you were bored. I won't bring up the past since I've moved on from that. And Skye, I think you should probably do the same."

"Okay," his voice broke. He turned around and started walking away slowly.

I wiped off my continuously dripping tears when he stopped his actions and tilted his head to his right side, enough to give me a better view of his face.

"My grandma was dying that time and I needed to go to Italy to take care of her myself," his lips trembled, "the maids and my cousins weren't enough. They didn't care for her as much as I did. I had to choose her over you. I'm sorry." As he said those last two words, his voice broke again, quickly making me break down in tears.

In this cold and windy night where the cars and crickets are the only thing you can hear, we were just standing, approximately three meters away from each other, crying and revealing the truths of what felt like yesterday.

"I never got bored of you," he said, "I want you to remember that."