A Letter for Mark || Markbam

12th Chapter

A/N Found the pic of 2Young in IG.. They're so handsome that I decided to use it for this chapter, although it's not related to the story :-)
I just wanted to bless your eyes.
But, don't forget that my main ship is still 2Jae :-D

Mark's POV

Jackson and I reached the dorm at nearly 1 a.m.  We were both sleepy so we headed straight to our rooms. 

"Hey, Markie, thanks. I had fun."
I heard him say before entering his room.

I slowly opened the door, careful not to wake Bambam. The bedside lamp was on. He probably left it so that I wouldn't grope in the dark. We habitually sleep with the lights off.

I sat on my bed and looked at Bambam then noticed his face scrunching up.  I knelt beside his bed to see closely, when suddenly he mumbled incoherent sounds.

"H-hyung.... hmm.. Sorry..no...stay...."

Then, a tear rolled down from his eye. 

What the heck!  He's dreaming..

His shoulders were quivering and it's obvious that he was having an unpleasant dream. I  held his arm and shook him.

"Bam, Bam! Wake up!"

It took a few more shaking from me before he opened his eyes. I helped him to sit up. He was breathing heavily and looked at me with wide eyes then placed his hand on his chest.

"Are you ok?" I asked as I began to rub his back. Still, he just blankly looked at me.

"Bad dream?" 

He nodded.

"You were crying. What did you dream of?"

He looked down and placed his face on his hands. I decided to run to the kitchen to get him a glass of water.

When I came back, he was absently staring at nothing. I sat on his bedside and offered him the drink.
He took a few sips then put the glass on the bedside table.

"Thanks, hyung."

"You're welcome. Now, tell me, what did you dream about?"

"I can't remember anymore. All I know is that it's a sad dream."

"I heard you saying, 'hyung, sorry, stay'...? Did you dream of your brother?"

"I can't recall anymore, hyung. I just know that there were many people. Then, I was talking to someone, but his face was unclear. But I can't recall why I cried."

"Ok, go back to sleep. Forget about it."

He lay down. I , too, lay down beside him, turning on my side, I caught his surprise. I smiled and said, "So if you dream again, I am beside you to wake you up."

I pulled him close to me and rub his back to relax him. I don't know why I felt the need to comfort him.

When I looked back at him, our eyes met.

"Hyung, you don't need to sleep beside me."

"Why? We used to do it before especially when we're both homesick.  Fact is, I miss that, Bam. I miss you.."

"Hyung..."

Our eyes were still connected.  I couldn't explain what I'm feeling at that moment. All I know is that I feel contented having Bambam close to me.

"I have a question, Bam."

He raised his brows in inquiry.

"Do we have a problem?"

"What do you mean, hyung?"

"I meant to talk to you before. I think now's the right time. Why do I feel that you are distancing yourself away from me? We were not like this before. But now, for no apparent reason, I feel that there is a wall between us. Or is it just me thinking that way?"

I think those were the longest sentences I have said to Bambam, since we drifted away from each other.  I guess, the few drinks I had in the bar made my tongue loose.

I kept quiet, waiting for his answer.  He was now looking at the ceiling.

"It just happened, hyung."

"I don't believe you.  There must be a reason. Why won't you tell me? Have I done something wrong? Have I offended you in some way?"

"No, hyung. Please believe what I say. You must not think like that."
He said as he looked at me once more.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Then, can we go back to the way we were before? I miss you."

Bambam's POV

"I miss you."

I couldn't take my eyes away from Mark's. We just stared at each other.
I couldn't believe that he said he misses me.  Dare I admit, that I miss him, too? His arm was still around me, our faces a few inches apart. My heart was beating wildly, I was afraid he could hear it.

It was true that we used to sleep beside each other before, just to comfort each other's loneliness.  But at that time, I thought of him as my hyung, an older brother whom I can turn to in the absence of my family.  We became close because we were roommates and we're both foreigners adjusting in a foreign soil at a very young age.  We shared this closeness with Jackson hyung, but now, it's a different story.

Deep in thoughts, I didn't realize that Mark was still waiting for my answer. I felt him blowing on my ear.

"Hyung! It tickles!"

He laughed. "Answer me, idiot!"

"Ok."

"Promise?"

"Yes, promise. Now, can we go to sleep?"

"Ok. Goodnight, my Bammie."

"Stop calling me your Bammie."

"Why? It means I love you coz you're my brother.  And I am happy, we're good now."  I simply nodded.

Mark tightened his arm around me, stifled a yawn and closed his eyes.

"Let's sleep, Bam. I can hardly open my eyes."

But I wish you would love me not as a brother.  Now, how will I keep myself from loving you more?  Those were my last thoughts before sleep overcame me.

______________

I wish I could make them kiss already. LOL..

Would you like that? :-)

Thank you to all of my readers

Date written: November 5, 2017