Always, Marinette • adrienette au

16 || tattered

He wanted to skip ahead. He knew there were other envelopes waiting to be delivered and Adrien's fingers ached to give them. He knew he had to read her diary and wait patiently to stumble on another letter but it seemed impossible now.

He wanted to read it all in on day. Let the sadness and darkness swallow him whole as he submerged himself into her.

Adrien limited himself to only a few entries a day for that reason. Her diary tore him apart. It left his chest an aching tattered mess and his eyes burning with unwanted tears. There were times that he wished she didn't give him the awful yet beautiful thing.

All it did was remind him that she was really gone.

Dear Ladybug,

I haven't been myself lately. I just want to lay in bed and cry. I'm dying and there isn't a medicine or cure that can make me better. I didn't go to school. My parents treat me like I'm made of glass. And I'm dying.

Alya stopped by to deliver my homework. I told her as soon as she stepped into my room. She was the first person I told about my sickness and it felt good to tell her. I felt like I was keeping a dark secret. I told my best friend that I was dying. The words left my lips so fast I thought she didn't hear them.

She fell to the floor. We cried together and held each other because we weren't sure what else to do.

Basically, she took it as well as a teenage girl who's best friend is dying could.

Always,
Marinette.

Adrien looked down at her handwriting trying to piece together a timeline. It was the only thing keeping him sane. All he had to do was focus on Marinette. Things would be better if she were here with him. Her diary was the closest thing he was going to get.

Her diary could never be her. It was only a matter of time before it finally settled in his chest. Marinette was truly gone and nothing could bring her back.

Dear Ladybug,

Alya took me to an outdoor concert for one the bands she likes. I know she's trying to distract me from what happening. I know she's just trying to spend more time with me.

The sun was warm and gently kissed my skin and the music was so loud it was in my chest. I felt alive. I just want to be alive.

The entire time I thought of the future. How I wanted to grow up with the one I loved. How I wanted to have a family of my own. How I wanted to love Adrien.

Oh god. How am I going to tell Adrien?

Always,
Marinette.