when it seems that nights
and days bring fright
Fright of the future
I escape it with humour
locks and bolts
On the black monster
that seems to want to destroy
my sanity
a days worth of vanity
and it's a rarity
and it's scaring me
that I don't know the strength of this monster inside of me
I try to drain it of its powers
but it takes more from me
leaving me in a shamble
as i gamble
through the day
to keep my mind intact and my mouth clamped from what my pain wants me to say
it's in those moments
that all the lies a synthesis
in my mind
to keep me sane
are done in vain
as they unfold
i'm not bold
to read the words they say
to scared to read the lines of world play
as they mould the thoughts I try to hide like clay
i can't keep my feet on the bay.
The wood falls beneath my feet
And I'm laying
in air of nothingness
im not moving
I'm not living
I'm breathing in as I ignore truths
hoping that god still loves me even when he shows me he does
I'm about to cry
