My Professor's Secret

14|

fourteen

"Please explain to me why you thought it was necessary to pack your entire dorm room? Not only are we gonna be gone for five days, but you do realize we're going home to where the rest of your things are? Bringing all of this is unnecessary," Christian protests, stuffing my belongings into the trunk of his friend's car.

"It's five outfits, Christian. You're probably the only person to ever bring one change of clothing for the span of a week."

"Forget it. Just get in," he pauses, shutting the trunk. "We have a long ride ahead of us and we all have to pitch in on driving. He's never driven this far and this was the only way I could convince him," Chris ends, heading to the passenger side door.

Before hitting the highway, Marcus stops at a gas station for a quick bathroom break and to fill the tank. We grab a few snacks for the road to hold us off from stopping for as long as we can.

I slept away the majority of the ride in hopes of holding onto every bit of energy I had until it was my turn to take over. Sleep was also the only thing strong enough to keep me from asking Christian the question that had been clawing at me since Taylor first opened her mouth about Trevor and Meghan. Rationalizing felt urgent. More urgent than it should have been. And if I had stayed awake long enough to let my thoughts settle on it, I already knew the outcome wouldn't have been pleasant.

By the time Christian stops at another gas station to fill the tank again, the sky has long since gone dark. He takes the passenger seat and leaves me the driver's side while Marcus sprawls across the backseat trying to recover whatever driving five straight hours had stolen from him.

With all the road left in front of us and my brother sitting right beside me, the strength it took not to meddle became harder to hold onto. Chris had to know what Meghan was planning to do. And if he did know already, surely he would've broken up with her the second he found out. Trevor didn't deserve whatever angle she was trying to work on him. He was too decent, too tired, and too obviously worn down to be dealing with someone like her on top of everything else.

Maybe that was the problem.

Maybe I had gotten too involved.

Too involved in a situation that had nothing to do with me. Too involved with a man whose problems weren't mine to carry while I was still trying to hold together pieces of my own life without dropping them all over the floor.

"So, how's Meghan? Last time I saw the two of you together you were practically kicking me out of your dorm so she could stay," I laugh, making sure to keep my tone light enough that it didn't sound like what it actually was.

Christian glances back toward Marcus before answering, like he's checking to make sure the conversation is still only ours.

"I didn't kick you out, Alexandrea," he sighs, side-eyeing me. "She's fine. We're fine, I guess. Why do you want to know?"

"What's with the attitude? I'm just trying to make conversation so I can survive getting us through this last stretch of road. If it makes you that upset, never mind."

Chris pulls his phone out and starts typing. The screen's glow is bright enough to light half the car, with the rest of the world swallowed in darkness beyond the windshield. We have an hour left.

"She and I have very different ideas of what it means to be in an exclusive relationship. We aren't dating anymore. We have sex occasionally but that's as far as our relationship goes," he sighs.

The words leave his mouth like they're supposed to sound casual, but they don't. Not to me. Christian had never been good at pretending not to care when he did. It was one of the few things about him that had never changed no matter how much older we got. He could lie to himself, maybe even to everyone else, but not convincingly enough for someone who knew him as well as I did.